Mommy To Be Quotes

Mommy To Be Quotes – Pregnancy brings a new meaning to the concept of beauty. It is a period of immense joy coupled with excitement. The feeling of carrying a little soul within you is magnificent. If you are expecting a little angel soon, here are a few quotes for you, which will motivate you, inspire you and will surely make you smile. And if you aren’t, then our collection of pregnancy quotes will make you realize how special and blessed pregnant women are.

To cerish the moment, enjoy our mommy tobe quotes list presented for you. Enjoy

Mommy To Be Quotes

“The hand of a bride becomes the hand of a mother. Ever so gently she cares for her precious child. Bathing, dressing, feeding, comforting—there is no hand like mother’s. Nor does its tender care diminish through the years.” —Thomas S. Monson

“We help God’s children best by providing ways to build faith in Jesus Christ and in His restored gospel when they are young.” —Henry B. Eyring

“Life is not only meant to be appreciated in retrospect . . . There is something each day to embrace and cherish.” —Dieter F. Uchtdorf

“There are few things more powerful than the faithful prayers of a righteous mother.” —Boyd K. Packer

“The work of a mother is hard, too often unheralded work. Please know that it is worth it then, now, and forever.” —Jeffrey R. Holland“

“To mothers who are raising their children without a father in the home, I promise you that as you speak of Jesus Christ, you will feel the power of heaven blessing you.” —Neil L. Andersen

My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever saw. All I am I owe to my mother. I attribute my success in life to the moral, intellectual, and physical education I received from her.” —George Washington

“There’s no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.” —Jill Churchill

“And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.” —Genesis 3:20

“Most mothers are instinctive philosophers.” —Harriet Beecher Stowe

“To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow.” —Maya Angelou

“The best place to cry is on a mother’s arms.” —Jodi Picoult

“The joy in motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times, but amid the challenges there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction.” —M. Russell Ballard

“My mother gave me life and never asked for anything in return. That is her secret you know, always giving without any expectations. She is as constant as the sunrise, the moon, the stars, and I count on her. She helps me find my way through the years and makes me laugh while doing it. There are some things only a mother can do.” —Unknown

“The phrase ‘working mother’ is redundant.” —Jane Sellman

“What a mother sings to the cradle goes all the way down to the coffin.” —Henry Ward Beecher

“Only God Himself fully appreciates the influence of a Christian mother in the molding of character in her children.” —Billy Graham

“A mother is the truest friend we have. When trials heavy and sudden fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.” —Washington Irving
“I love these little people, and it is not a slight thing when they who are so fresh from God love us.” —Charles Dickens

“Pregnancy and motherhood are the most beautiful and significantly life-altering events that I have ever experienced.” —Elisabeth Hasselback

“‘I have no need for children for it is happiness I am in search,’ and all the while she spoke, I smiled while happiness tugged at my skirt.” —Unknown

“No society will long survive without mothers who care for their young and provide that nurturing care so essential for their normal development.” —Ezra Taft Benson

“A mother is one to whom you hurry when you are troubled.” —Emily Dickinson

“A miracle is really the only way to describe motherhood and giving birth. It’s unbelievable how God has made us women and babies to endure and be able to do so much. A miracle indeed. Such an incredible blessing.” —Jennie Finch

“Men have to have something given to them to make them saviors of men, but not mothers, not women. They are born with an inherent right, an inherent authority, to be the saviors of human souls … and the regenerating force in the lives of God’s children.” —Matthew Cowley

“She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.” —Proverbs 31:27–30

“Teach her to look to the Author and Finisher of her faith for her validation and worth. Help her to fear only God and not man. And remind her that the mission-field of home is a battleground worth fighting for.” —Kelly Crawford

“All those clichés—those things you hear about having a baby and motherhood—all of them are true. And all of them are the most beautiful things you will ever experience.” —Penelope Cruz

“All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.” —Abraham Lincoln

“I will protect you until you are grown and then I will let you fly free, but loving you, that is for always.” —Charlotte Gray

“There is no greater good in all the world than motherhood. The influence of a mother in the lives of her children is beyond calculation.” —James E. Faust

“A mother’s love is whole no matter how many times it’s divided.” —Unknown

“Being a mother is not about what you gave up to have a child, but what you’ve gained from having one.” —Sunny Gupta

“As daughters of our Heavenly Father, and as daughters of Eve, we are all mothers and we have always been mothers. And we each have the responsibility to love and help lead the rising generation.” —Sheri L. Dew

“Motherhood has completely changed me. It’s just about like the most completely humbling experience that I’ve ever had. I think that it puts you in your place because it really forces you to address the issues that you claim to believe in, and if you can’t stand up to those principles when you’re raising a child, forget it.” —Diane Keaton

“A mother’s arms are made of tenderness, and children sleep soundly in them.” —Victor Hugo

“Parents must have the courage to say no, to defend truth, and to bear powerful testimony.” —Quentin L. Cook

“Motherhood was the great equalizer for me; I started to identify with everybody. … As a mother, you have that impulse to wish that no child should ever be hurt, or abused, or go hungry, or not have opportunities in life.” —Annie Lennox

“A mother understands what a child does not say.” —Unknown

“I don’t know about changing my perspective, because motherhood is such a glorious blessing and I am very thankful for that. It is such a beautiful experience. I so strongly recommend it. It’s bliss, love, and fulfillment of another level.” —Aishwarya Rai Bachchan

“My mom is a hard worker. She puts her head down and she gets it done. And she finds a way to have fun. She always says, ‘Happiness is your own responsibility.’ That’s probably what I quote from her and live by the most.” —Jennifer Garner

“Perhaps the reason we respond so universally to our mothers’ love is because it typifies the love of our Savior.” —Bradley D. Foster

“Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in, it is what God gave you time for.” —Rachel JanKovic

“Completeness? Happiness? These words don’t come close to describing my emotions. There truly is nothing I can say to capture what motherhood means to me, particularly given my medical history.” —Anita Baker

“There is no role in life more essential and more eternal than that of motherhood.” —M. Russell Ballard

“Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall; a mother’s secret hope outlives them all.” —Oliver Wendell Holmes

“She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.” —Proverbs 31:26

“Motherhood has taught me the meaning of living in the moment and being at peace. Children don’t think about yesterday, and they don’t think about tomorrow. They just exist in the moment.” —Jessalyn Gilsig

“The ultimate treasures on earth and in heaven are our children and our posterity.” —Dallin H. Oaks

“As it stands, motherhood is a sort of wilderness through which each woman hacks her way, part martyr, part pioneer; a turn of events from which some women derive feelings of heroism, while others experience a sense of exile from the world they knew.” —Rachel Cusk

“Motherhood is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind. It places her who honors its holy calling and service next to the angels.” —First Presidency, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
“Sometimes the strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws.” —Barbara Kingsolver
“Women bring with them into the world a certain virtue, a divine gift that makes them adept at instilling such qualities as faith, courage, empathy, and refinement in relationships and in cultures.” —D. Todd Christofferson

“Motherhood is a choice you make every day to put someone else’s happiness and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when you’re not sure what the right thing is, … and to forgive yourself over and over again for doing everything wrong.” —Donna Ball

“You instantly become less selfish. You can’t be the biggest person in the world anymore—they are. Motherhood really grounds you.” —Keri Russell
“The highest and noblest work in this life is that of a mother.” —Russell M. Nelson
“Being a mother is one of the highest salaried jobs in my field since the payment is pure love.” —Mildred B. Vermont

“A mother is she who can take the place of all others, but whose place no one else can take.” —Unknown

“Mothers hold their children’s hands for a short while but their hearts forever.” —Unknown

“I know of no better answer to [the] foul practices that confront our young people than the teachings of a mother, given in love with an unmistakable warning.” —Gordon B. Hinckley

“A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.” —Tenneva Jordan

“Becoming a mother makes you realize you can do almost anything one-handed.” —Unknown

“Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn’t know you had, and dealing with fears you didn’t know existed.” —Linda Wooten

“Mothers of today have no greater opportunity and no more serious challenge than to do all they can to strengthen the home.” —L. Tom Perry

“I love my mother as the trees love water and sunshine; she helps me grow, prosper, and reach great heights.” —Terri Guillemets

“There will be so many times you feel like you’ve failed, but in the eyes, heart, and mind of your child, you are super mom.” —Stephanie Precourt

“Who can justly measure the righteous influence of a mother’s love? What enduring fruits result from the seeds of truth that a mother carefully plants and lovingly cultivates in the fertile soil of a child’s trusting mind and heart? As a mother, you have been given divine instincts to help you sense your child’s special talents and unique capacities.” —Richard G. Scott
“Homemaking is surely in reality the most important work in the world.” —C.S. Lewis

“I believe in love at first sight, because I’ve been loving my mother since I opened my eyes.” —Unknown

“God’s most extraordinary work is most often done by ordinary people in the seeming obscurity of a home and family.” —Neal A. Maxwell

“When you’re in the thick of raising your kids by yourself, you tend to keep a running list of everything you think you’re doing wrong. I recommend taking a lot of family pictures as evidence to the contrary.” —Connie Shultz

“Mothers and children are in a category all their own. There’s no bond so strong in the entire world. No love so instantaneous and forgiving.” —Gail Tsukiyama
“Love as powerful as your mother’s for you leaves its own mark. … To have been loved so deeply … will give us some protection forever.” —J. K. Rowling

“The more I live, the more I recognize that the teaching moments in my youth, especially those provided by my parents, have shaped my life and made me who I am. It is impossible to overestimate the influence of parents who understand the hearts of their children.” —Robert D. Hales

“A mother’s arms are more comforting than anyone elses.” —Princess Diana

“Being a young mom means that we met a little early, but it also means I get to love you a little longer. Some people said that my life ended when I had a baby, but my life had just begun. You didn’t take away from my future, you gave me a new one.” —Unknown

“If you try your best to be the best parent you can be, you will have done all that a human being can do and all that God expects you to do.” —Jeffrey R. Holland

“Your greatest contribution to the kingdom of God may not be something you do, but someone you raise.” —Andy Stanley

“When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.” —Sophia Loren

“You will come to know that what appears today to be a sacrifice will prove instead to be the greatest investment that you will ever make.” —Gordon B. Hinckley

“My mother is my root, my foundation. She planted the seed that I base my life on, and that is the belief that the ability to achieve starts in your mind.” —Michael Jordan

“Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.” —Oprah Winfrey

“Feeling the security and constancy of love from a spouse, a parent or a child is a rich blessing. Such love nurtures and sustains faith in God. Such love is a source of strength and casts out fear. Such love is the desire of every human soul.” —David A. Bednar

“Mama was my greatest teacher, a teacher of compassion, love, and fearlessness. If love is sweet as a flower, then my mother is that sweet flower of love.” —Stevie Wonder

“Motherhood has a very humanizing effect. Everything gets reduced to essentials.” —Meryl Streep

“The bond between mothers and their children is one defined by love. As a mother’s prayers for her children are unending, so are the wisdom, grace, and strength they provide to their children.” —President George W. Bush

“No woman who understands the gospel would ever think that any other work is more important or would ever say, “I am just a mother,” for mothers heal the souls of men.” —Sheri Dew

“Because I feel that in the heavens above, the angels whispering to one another can find among their burning terms of love, none so devotional as that of ‘mother.’” —Edgar Allan Poe

“There ought to be a hall of fame for mamas, creation’s most unique and precious pearl, and heaven help us always to remember, that the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.” —Glen Campbell

“The joy of motherhood comes in moments. … Families need unstructured time when relationships can deepen and real parenting can take place. Take time to listen, to laugh, and to play together.” —M. Russell Ballard

“When my children are hurt or disappointed I need to lead them to Jesus. I am not enough, but Jesus is.” —Unknown

“I see myself as a mom first. I’m so lucky to have that role in life. The world can like me, hate me, or fall apart around me and at least I wake up with my kids and I’m happy.” —Angelina Jolie

“You have nothing in this world more precious than your children. When you grow old, when your hair turns white and your body grows weary, when you are prone to sit in a rocker and meditate on the things of your life, nothing will be so important as the question of how your children have turned out. … Do not trade your birthright as a mother for some bauble of passing value. … The baby you hold in your arms will grow quickly as the sunrise and sunset of the rushing days.” —Gordon B. Hinckley
“Being a mom has made me so tired—and so happy.” —Tina Fey

“The name of mother: The noblest thoughts my soul can claim. The holiest words my tongue can frame. Unworthy are to frame the name more sacred than all other. An infant when her love first came, a man, I find it just the same. Reverently I breathe her name—The blessed name of mother.” —George Griffith Fetter

“Motherhood is heart-exploding, blissful hysteria.” —Olivia Wilde

“My mom is my hero. She inspired me to dream when I was a kid, so anytime anyone inspires you to dream, that’s gotta be your hero.” —Tim McGraw

“If a child is not listening, don’t despair. Time and truth are on your side. At the right moment, your words will return as if from heaven itself. Your testimony will never leave your children.” —Neil L. Andersen

“I have found being a mother has made me emotionally raw in many situations. Your heart is beating outside your body when you have a baby.” —Kate Beckinsale

“There is eternal influence and power in motherhood.” —Unknown

“A baby is something you carry inside you for nine months, in your arms for three years, and in your heart until your death.”

best pregnancy quotes“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before.”

“Giving birth is an ecstatic jubilant adventure not available to males.”

“A baby fills a place in your heart that you never knew was empty.”

“Making the decision to have a baby is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.”

“Babies are bits of star-dust blown from the hand of God. Lucky is the woman who knows the pangs of birth for she has held a star.”

“Before you were conceived I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour I would die for you. This is the miracle of Mother’s Love.”

“Pregnancy is getting company inside one’s skin.”

“What good fathers and mothers instinctively feel like doing for their babies is usually best after all.”

“There is no way out of the experience except through it, because it is not really your experience at all but the baby’s. Your body is the child’s instrument of birth.”

“A mother’s joy begins when new life is stirring inside… when a tiny heartbeat is heard for the very first time, and a playful kick reminds her that she is never alone.”

A woman has two smiles that an angel might envy, the smile that accepts a lover before words are uttered, and the smile that lights on the first born babe, and assures it of a mother’s love.”

“Sometimes when you pick up your child, you can feel the map of your own bones under your hands, or smell the scent of your skin in the nape of his neck. This is the most extraordinary thing about motherhood – finding a piece of yourself separate and apart that all the same you could not live without.”

“Life is always a rich and steady time when you are waiting for something to happen or hatch.”

“Before you were born, I carried you under my heart. From the moment you arrived in this world until the moment I leave it, I will always carry you in my heart.”

“A ship under sail and a big bellied woman, are the handsomest two things that can be seen commonly.”

“Pregnancy is a process that invites you to surrender to the unseen force behind all life.”

funny pregnancy quotes“There is a sanctity involved with bringing a child into this world, it is better than bombing one out of it.”

“My mother groaned, my father wept, into the dangerous world I leapt.”

“Feeling fat lasts nine months, but the joy of becoming a mom lasts forever.”

“Giving birth should be your greatest achievement, not your greatest fear.”

“Giving birth is not a matter of pushing, expelling the baby, but of yielding, surrendering to birth energy.”

“Giving birth and being born brings us into the essence of creation, where the human spirit is courageous and bold and the body, a miracle of wisdom.”

“A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten and the future worth living for.”

“Everything grows rounder and wider and weirder, and I sit here in the middle of it all and wonder who in the world you will turn out to be.”

“Life is magic, the way nature works seems to be quite magical.”

“The most important thing she’d learned over the years was that there was no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.”

“Think of stretch marks and pregnancy service stripes.”

“Your baby will be only inside you for nine months, so enjoy the intimacy as long as it lasts.”

“Being pregnant changes you as a person. Each day is part of this amazing journey that completely shifts the focus of life and reevaluates personal and professional goals.”

“Going into a pregnancy is a really challenging time for a woman, because it is forever changing, both mentally and physically.”

“Whether your pregnancy was meticulously planned, medically coaxed, or happened by surprise, one thing is certain – your life will never be the same.”

“To be pregnant is to be vitally alive, thoroughly woman, and distressingly inhabited. Soul and spirit are stretched – along with body – making, pregnancy a time of transition, growth, and profound beginnings.”

“You are pregnant and powerful. You are bold and you are beautiful. Go forward in your boldness, in your beauty and in your contentedness. Trust your body to birth and know that the collective power if women worldwide will be with you.”

“You do a lot of growing up when you are pregnant. “

“Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers… strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.”

“When you moved, I felt squeezed with a wild infatuation and protectiveness. We are one. Nothing, not even death, can change that.”

“I begin to love this little creature, and to anticipate his birth as a fresh twist to a-know which I do not wish to unite.”

“People always say that pregnant women have a glow. And I say it’s because you are sweating to death.”

“Life is a flame that is always burning itself out, but it catches fire again every time a child is born.”

“All the time we wondered and wondered, who is this person coming, growing, turning, floating, swimming deep, deep inside?”

“There is no way out of the experience except through it, because it is not really your experience at all but the baby’s. your body is child’s instrument of birth.”

“If I had my life to live over, instead if wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.”

“In pregnancy, there are two bodies, one inside the other. Two people live under one skin. When so much of life is dedicated to maintaining our integrity as distinct beings, this bodily tandem is an uncanny fact.”

“In giving birth to our babies, we may find that we give birth to new possibilities within ourselves.”

“That first pregnancy is a long sea journey to a country where you don’t know the language, where land is in sight for such a long time that after a while, it’s just the horizon – and then one day birds wheel over that dark shape and it’s suddenly close, and all you can do is hope like hell that you’ve had the right shots.”

“Giving birth and being born brings us into the essence of creation, where the human spirit is courageous and bold and the body, a miracle of wisdom.”

“Pregnancy seems designed to prepare you for life as a mother. You start making sacrifices nine months before the child is born, so by the time they put in an appearance you are used to giving things up for them.”

“A strong intention, a relaxed body and an open mind are the main ingredients for an active birth.”

“A great joy is coming.”

“A grand adventure is about to begin.”

When you grow up by the sea, you spend a good deal of time looking at the horizon. You wonder what on Earth the waves might bring – and where the sea might deposit you – until one day you know you have lived between two places, the scene of arrival and the point of departure.
Andrew O’Hagan

Having a baby is a life-changer. It gives you a whole other perspective on why you wake up every day.
Taylor Hanson

When you hold your baby in your arms the first time, and you think of all the things you can say and do to influence him, it’s a tremendous responsibility. What you do with him can influence not only him, but everyone he meets and not for a day or a month or a year but for time and eternity.
Rose Kennedy

Babies don’t need fathers, but mothers do. Someone who is taking care of a baby needs to be taken care of.
Amy Heckerling

In the Mexican culture, we never miss a baptism, a birthday, a baby shower, a wedding shower, a wedding. You must show up. Otherwise, you’ll be in big trouble.
Eva Longoria

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Quotes About Thankfulness

Quotes About Thankfulness – Gratitude, thankfulness, or gratefulness is the proper, fitting or called-for response to benefits or beneficence from a benefactor. The experience of gratitude has historically been a focus of several world religions. It has also been a topic of interest to ancient, medieval and modern philosophers, and continues to engage contemporary western philosophers today. The systematic study of gratitude within psychology only began around the year 2000, possibly because psychology has traditionally been focused more on understanding distress rather than understanding positive emotions. The study of gratitude within psychology has focused on the understanding of the short term experience of the emotion of gratitude (state gratitude), individual differences in how frequently people feel gratitude (trait gratitude), and the relationship between these two aspects.

According to Cicero, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of the virtues but the parent of all others.” Multiple studies have shown the correlation between gratitude and increased wellbeing not only for the individual but for all people involved. The positive psychology movement has embraced these studies and in an effort to increase overall well-being, has begun to make an effort to incorporate exercises to increase gratitude into the movement. Although in the past gratitude has been neglected by psychology, in recent years much progress has been made in studying gratitude and its positive effects.

To make your life more positive, read these quotes about thankfulness that we already sort for you. Enjoy!

Quotes About Thankfulness

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough”
― Oprah Winfrey

“I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.”
― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

“Sometimes we spend so much time and energy thinking about where we want to go that we don’t notice where we happen to be.”
― Dan Gutman, The Genius Files #4: From Texas with Love

“Whatever happens in your life, no matter how troubling things might seem, do not enter the neighborhood of despair. Even when all doors remain closed, God will open up a new path only for you. Be thankful!”
― Elif Shafak, The Forty Rules of Love

“One of the main reasons that we lose our enthusiasm in life is because we become ungrateful..we let what was once a miracle become common to us. We get so accustomed to his goodness it becomes a routine..”
― Joel Osteen, Your Best Life Now: 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential

“Perhaps it takes a purer faith to praise God for unrealized blessings than for those we once enjoyed or those we enjoy now.”
― A.W. Tozer

“Do not indulge in dreams of having what you have not, but reckon up the chief of the blessings you do possess, and then thankfully remember how you would crave for them if they were not yours.”
― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

“Rest and be thankful.”
― William Wordsworth

“We pray for the big things and forget to give thanks for the ordinary, small (and yet really not small) gifts.”
― Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Life Together: The Classic Exploration of Christian Community

“Those blessings are sweetest that are won with prayer and worn with thanks.”
― Thomas Goodwin

“People complain about the bad things that happen to em that they don’t deserve but they seldom mention the good. About what they done to deserve them things”
― Cormac McCarthy, No Country for Old Men

“Sometimes we focus so much on what we don’t have that we fail to see, appreciate, and use what we do have!”
― Jeff Dixon

“We would worry less if we praised more. Thanksgiving is the enemy of discontent and dissatisfaction.”
― H.A. Ironside

“Thankfulness creates gratitude which generates contentment that causes peace.”
― Todd Stocker

“Life without thankfulness is devoid of love and passion. Hope without thankfulness is lacking in fine perception. Faith without thankfulness lacks strength and fortitude. Every virtue divorced from thankfulness is maimed and limps along the spiritual road.”
― John Henry Jowett

“I may not be where I want to be but I’m thankful for not being where I used to be.”
― Habeeb Akande

“This is the Lord’s doing, and it is marvelous in our eyes.”
― Elizabeth I

“Courtesies of a small and trivial character are the ones which strike deepest in the grateful and appreciating heart.”
― Henry Clay

“Be thankful for your allotment in an imperfect world.  Though better circumstances can be imagined, far worse are nearer misses than you probably care to realize.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway

“Gratitude paints little smiley faces on everything it touches.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway

“Every once in a while God allows you to stub your toe as a kind reminder to be grateful for the miraculous body attached to it.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway

“Rest and be thankful.”
― William Wadsworth

“Even the smallest tender mercy can bring peace when recognized and appreciated.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway

“Do not say, ‘But it is hypocritical to thank God with my tongue when I don’t feel thankful in my heart.’ There is such a thing as hypocritical thanksgiving. Its aim is to conceal ingratitude and get the praise of men. That is not your aim. Your aim in loosing your tongue with words of gratitude is that God would be merciful and fill your words with the emotion of true gratitude. You are not seeking the praise of men; you are seeing the mercy of God. You are not hiding the hardness of ingratitude, but hoping for the in-breaking of the Spirit.

Thanksgiving with the Mouth Stirs Up Thankfulness in the Heart

Moreover, we should probably ask the despairing saint, ‘Do you know your heart so well that you are sure the words of thanks have no trace of gratitude in them?’ I, for one, distrust my own assessment of my motives. I doubt that I know my good ones well enough to see all the traces of contamination. And I doubt that I know my bad ones well enough to see the traces of grace. Therefore, it is not folly for a Christian to assume that there is a residue of gratitude in his heart when he speaks and sings of God’s goodness even though he feels little or nothing. To this should be added that experience shows that doing the right thing, in the way I have described, is often the way toward being in the right frame. Hence Baxter gives this wise counsel to the oppressed Christian:

‘Resolve to spend most of your time in thanksgiving and praising God. If you cannot do it with the joy that you should, yet do it as you can. You have not the power of your comforts; but have you no power of your tongues? Say not that you are unfit for thanks and praises unless you have a praising heart and were the children of God; for every man, good and bad, is bound to praise God, and to be thankful for all that he hath received, and to do it as well as he can, rather than leave it undone…. Doing it as you can is the way to be able to do it better. Thanksgiving stirreth up thankfulness in the heart.”
― John Piper, When the Darkness Will Not Lift: Doing What We Can While We Wait for God–And Joy

“Gratitude is an overflow of the pleasure filling your soul.”
― Raheel Farooq

“You simply will not be the same person two months from now after consciously giving thanks each day for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given you”
― Sarah Ban Breathnach, Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy

“We return to you, O earth, the things which you have given us willingly and most graciously; with our hearts, hands and minds, in the best way we know how.”
― Taj Mahal

“Joy is thankfulness, and when we are joyful, that is the best expression of thanks we can offer the Lord, Who delivers us from sorrow and sin.”
― Thaddeus of Vitovnica, Our Thoughts Determine Our Lives: The Life and Teachings of Elder Thaddeus of Vitovnica

“To witness miracles unfold in your experience, count your blessings and be thankful. Perceived small blessings accumulate to be the most powerful.”
― T.F. Hodge, From Within I Rise: Spiritual Triumph Over Death and Conscious Encounters with “The Divine Presence”

― A.J. Jacobs, The Year of Living Biblically: One Man’s Humble Quest to Follow the Bible as Literally as Possible

“This is for you,’ he (the Alchemist) said, holding one of the parts (of gold) out to the monk. ‘It’s for your generosity to the pilgrims.’
‘But this payment goes well beyond my generosity,’ the monk responded.
‘Don’t say that again. Life might be listening, and give you less the next time.”
― Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

“Walk together. Feel the heart beats. Experience the presence. This is how to be thankful.”
― Amit Ray

“The soul that gives thanks can find comfort in everything; the soul that complains can find comfort in nothing.”
― Hannah Whitall Smith

“It is only normal that people count losses with their minds, and ignore to count blessings with the graciousness of their hearts.”
― Suzy Kassem, Rise Up and Salute the Sun: The Writings of Suzy Kassem

“Ingratitude to God does not rely only on our refusal to give the verbal thanksgiving due to Him, but also recides in our inability to appreciate his gifts and potentials in us by leaving them untapped.”
“We all go through hard times in life. It’s a part of being alive and it’s the reality we all have to deal with. There are times we forget our value as a person because we are so blinded with these thoughts of loneliness, emptiness and ego. Somewhere along the road we become numbed with all the frustrations and dissatisfaction. But life itself isn’t always about darkness and sadness, Life is also filled with colors and that makes it beautiful. Along this path of darkness there’s always light waiting to be seen by our daunted hearts. Our heart is gifted to see this light. It may be hiding behind those circumstances that we encounter; in a stranger we just met at an unexpected place; a family who has been always there but you just ignored because of your imperfect relationship with them; it might be a long time friend you have or a friend you just met. Open your heart and you will see how blessed you are to have them all in your life. Sometimes they are the light that shines your path in some dark phases of life. Don’t lose hope”
― Chanda Kaushik

“Rachel? my dad prompts.
Do I have to…?”
His stern expression answers my question
Fine. I’m grateful that the Native Americans are finally getting revenge on the white man for destroying their culture, by building megacasinos.”
― Melissa Schorr, Goy Crazy

“Life is a web of intersections and choices. Your 1st choice is to recognize an intersection. Your 2nd choice is to be grateful for it.”
― Ryan Lilly

“One may suffer the long-term in order to grow in appreciation for the small things. For in short-term suffering, one only notices the large.”
― Criss Jami, Healology

“When God takes out the trash, don’t go digging back through it. Trust Him.”
― Amaka Imani Nkosazana, Heart Crush

“The thanks of a weak one are but of little value,” he muttered, “but you have them, for truly, in this past week, little but scraps have come my way- and for all my body is small, yet is my appetite unseemly great.”
― Isaac Asimov, Foundation and Empire

“Everything that I hold will eventually be gone. Subsequently, the quality of my life will depend on whether I choose to appreciate those things ‘now’ or wait until ‘then.”
― Craig D. Lounsbrough

― Heidi Barr, Prairie Grown: Stories and Recipes from a South Dakota Hillside

“What we need, we have.”
― Lailah Gifty Akita

“In matters of love: When giving, be generous! When taking, be thankful!”
― Mehmet Murat ildan

“Until I realize that it’s all I gift, I can hold all of it and yet receive none of it.”
― Craig D. Lounsbrough

“Let us give thanks for our shadows
for they are there in the first place
because of the presence of light.”
― Kamand Kojouri

“I thank God for every experience.”
― Lailah Gifty Akita

“You should live in such a way that looking back at your past later on in the future, you will thank God for your life and for what He has done for you”
― Sunday Adelaja

“The cup is both half full and half empty; it has never been one or the other. Stop obsessing over a trivial point and be thankful you have something to drink.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Slaying Dragons

“Thank you for the day and night,
for rainy spells and summer’s light.
Thank you for the skies of blue
and puffy clouds in grayish hue.
Thank you for the gigglefests
and midnight’s cloak to hasten rest.
Thank you for tomorrow new
and yesterday’s tomorrow too.
Thank you for “I’m glad we met”
and also for “we haven’t yet.”
Thank you for the peace of mind
a grateful soul doth always find.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Slaying Dragons

“It is easy to say I am thankful for the sweet and beautiful things in life: flower gardens, ice cream cones, diamond rings, dances under moonlight, children’s laughter, birdsongs, and the like. The challenge is recognizing things of value in the dark, sour, uglier parts of life. But if you look hard enough, you will find that even tough times offer pearls worthy of gratitude.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Slaying Dragons

“Find much to be grateful for in every day. Doing so will not only enrich your life, it will bless those around you in ways you may never know.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Slaying Dragons

“What are you most thankful for?” she asked.
My reply came easily. “Being too blessed to have any hope of answering that question.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Slaying Dragons

“God is omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent. He is intricately involved in our lives and for that alone, we should be thankful.”
― Robin Bertram, No Regrets: How Loving Deeply and Living Passionately Can Impact Your Legacy Forever

“Thank God, thank God.”
― Lailah Gifty Akita

“Be happy in the day – Today is enough – Each moment is all we need in the today given and not the tomorrow to come”
― John M Sheehan

“Some of the best things that have ever happened to us wouldn’t have happened to us, if it weren’t for some of the worst things that have ever happened to us.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“Be savagely thankful, and continuously in awe of the power you possess. You are alive. Inside of an endless cosmos with the freedom that shines brightest in the dark.. Choices.

Your choices belong to you so intimately, that they will never leave you. They, unlike the changing nature of love, where the failing machinery of our bodies will never abandon you to time. Good or bad, they will stay always. An antique that shows the future who you were and what you stood for.

So know that what you choose to stand for, is what will inform you of what you’ve chosen to stand against, so stand. Let each foot crash land into what you believe, and plant them they’re firmly so they may take root in your convictions. And stand.”
― Shane L. Koyczan

“If I have never had, or worse yet, I have lost the conviction that life (despite all of the blows it wields and the savagery that it spawns) is nonetheless an incalculable privilege, I will have in that single loss forfeited the whole of my life and effectively wiped out any hope that I can or will do anything other than exist.”
― Craig D. Lounsbrough

“Gratitude turns disappointment into lessons learned, discoveries made, alternatives explored, and new plans set in motion.”
― Auliq-Ice

“The single greatest cause of happiness is gratitude.”
― Auliq-Ice

“To live, to truly live, one must consider each and every thing a blessing.”
“Happiness changes the way you see the world.”
― Auliq Ice

“I had, even in this miserable condition, been comforted with the knowledge of Himself, and the hope of His blessing: which was a felicity more than sufficiently equivalent to all the misery which I had suffered, or could suffer.”
― Daniel DEFOE (c.1660 – 1731), Robinson Crusoe

“It is very sad that most of us just aren’t grateful for what we have. If you’re reading this, I think it’s safe to assume that you’re not homeless. You’re not blind. You might be ill, but you’re still alive. And yet, we find it hard to be thankful. To see the gift each day brings us. It is from this lack of true gratitude that we become sad. We have told ourselves over and over that we aren’t happy. That our lives aren’t good. That we’re no good.”
― S.R. Crawford, From My Suffering: 25 Ways to Break the Chains of Anxiety, Depression & Stress

“She looked down at her bulging veins and she remembered the most important thing that she had forgotten – she was alive.”
― S.R. Crawford, From My Suffering: 25 Ways to Break the Chains of Anxiety, Depression & Stress

“Only having valued a thing, can you truly be thankful. You can not be sincerely thankful for what you have not valued.”

“Gratitude changes us.”
― Auliq Ice, The Secret of Greatness

“FACING LIFE’S TRIALS, CHALLENGES AND DIFFICULTIES, IS THE BEST WAY TO DEAL WITH LIFE.”
― Auliq-Ice

“This life-enhancing, happiness-inducing miracle drug that does, in fact, ruthlessly kill its enemies—you’ve guessed it—is gratitude.”
― Auliq Ice

“Be open about your thoughts, ideas, and desires and you will be right with your decisions.”
― Auliq Ice

“Happiness is long-lasting, a condition of the soul, the foundation on which the circumstances of life are experienced, endured, or enjoyed.”

“Happiness is the condition of who we are and how we think and what we believe and how we live.”
― Auliq Ice

“Gratitude is a miracle of its own recognition. It brings out a sense of appreciation and sincerity of a being.”
― Auliq-Ice

“You want to become a better person?
Just give thanks.
Give thanks for all of it.”
― Kamand Kojouri

“For the grateful, there is no room for disappointment; Each moment offers life.”
― Auliq-Ice

“Those who are truly grateful are deeply moved by the privilege of living.”
“Expressing thankfulness energizes, enhances, and empowers.”
― Skip Prichard

“Lord, I’m thankful for every stumble because it was then that You lifted me; I’m thankful for every heartache that made me stronger than I knew I could be.”
― Lisa Mischelle Wood, Just Believe: A Collection of Christian Poetry

“It’s not about some principled debate as to whether I should focus on what I have, or on what I don’t have. Rather, it’s about being thankful that I have the privilege to enjoy the former, and the opportunity to contemplate the latter.”
― Craig D. Lounsbrough

“Positive thought + positive action = positive results.”
― Gloria Vester, From Raccoon Poop to Pansies: How To Use the Power of Positive Thought Waves to Change Your Life

“…she found herself blessing God for her creation, preservation, and all the blessings of this life, but above all for His inestimable Love; out loud; in a burst of acknowledgement.”
― Elizabeth von Arnim, The Enchanted April

Image Quotes About Thankfulness

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cs Lewis Quotes On Love (With Video)

CS Lewis Quotes On Love – (29 November 1898 – 22 November 1963) was a British novelist, poet, academic, medievalist, literary critic, essayist, lay theologian, broadcaster, lecturer, and Christian apologist. He held academic positions at both Oxford University (Magdalen College, 1925–1954) and Cambridge University (Magdalene College, 1954–1963). He is best known for his works of fiction, especially The Screwtape Letters, The Chronicles of Narnia, and The Space Trilogy, and for his non-fiction Christian apologetics, such as Mere Christianity, Miracles, and The Problem of Pain.

Lewis and fellow novelist J. R. R. Tolkien were close friends. They both served on the English faculty at Oxford University, and were active in the informal Oxford literary group known as the Inklings. According to Lewis’s memoir Surprised by Joy, he was baptised in the Church of Ireland, but fell away from his faith during adolescence. Lewis returned to Anglicanism at the age of 32, owing to the influence of Tolkien and other friends, and he became an “ordinary layman of the Church of England”. Lewis’s faith profoundly affected his work, and his wartime radio broadcasts on the subject of Christianity brought him wide acclaim.

Lewis wrote more than 30 books, which have been translated into more than 30 languages and have sold millions of copies. The books that make up The Chronicles of Narnia have sold the most and have been popularised on stage, TV, radio, and cinema. His philosophical writings are widely cited by Christian apologetics from many denominations.

In 1956, Lewis married American writer Joy Davidman; she died of cancer four years later at the age of 45. Lewis died on 22 November 1963 from renal failure, one week before his 65th birthday. In 2013, on the 50th anniversary of his death, Lewis was honoured with a memorial in Poets’ Corner in Westminster Abbey. His works entered the public domain in 2014 in countries where copyright expires 50 years after the death of the creator, such as Canada.

To remember his great works, here we present to you memorable quotes from CS Lewis about love, friendship, happiness, and faith.

Cs Lewis Quotes On Love

“To love at all is to be vulnerable”

“Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person’s ultimate good as far as it can be obtained.”

“We are mirrors whose brightness is wholly derived from the sun that shines upon us.”

“Being in love” first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise.

“Love is something more stern and splendid than mere kindness.”

“What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it.”

“It is not out of compliment that lovers keep on telling one another how beautiful they are; the delight is incomplete till it is expressed”

“Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive.”

“Though our feelings come and go, his love for us does not.”

“Free will, though it makes evil possible, is also the only thing that makes possible any love or goodness or joy worth having.”

“Do not waste time bothering whether you ‘love’ your neighbor; act as if you do, and you will presently come to love him.”

“Don’t let your happiness depend on something you may lose.”

“Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person’s ultimate good as far as it can be obtained”

“Do not waste time bothering whether you “love” your neighbor; act as if you did.As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone you will presently come to love him.”

“Though our feelings come and go, God’s love for us does not.”

“Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person’s ultimate good as far as it can be obtained”

“Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives”

“Have you not seen that in our days
Of any whose story, song or art
Delights us, our sincerest praise
Means, when all’s said, ‘You break my heart?”

“Do not waste time bothering whether you “love” your neighbor; act as if you did.As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone you will presently come to love him.”

“The Christian does not think God will love us because we are good, but that God will make us good because He loves us.”

 

CS Lewis Quotes On Friendship

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”

“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.”

“What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it.”

“In friendship…we think we have chosen our peers. In reality a few years’ difference in the dates of our births, a few more miles between certain houses, the choice of one university instead of another…the accident of a topic being raised or not raised at a first meeting–any of these chances might have kept us apart. But, for a Christian, there are, strictly speaking no chances. A secret master of ceremonies has been at work. Christ, who said to the disciples, “Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you,” can truly say to every group of Christian friends, “Ye have not chosen one another but I have chosen you for one another.” The friendship is not a reward for our discriminating and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each of us the beauties of others.”

CS Lewis Quotes On Faith

“I am trying here to prevent anyone saying the really foolish thing that people often say about Him: I’m ready to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher, but I don’t accept his claim to be God. That is the one thing we must not say. A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher. He would either be a lunatic — on the level with the man who says he is a poached egg — or else he would be the Devil of Hell. You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God, or else a madman or something worse. You can shut him up for a fool, you can spit at him and kill him as a demon or you can fall at his feet and call him Lord and God, but let us not come with any patronizing nonsense about his being a great human teacher. He has not left that open to us. He did not intend to.”

“[God] will not be used as a convenience. Men or nations who think they can revive the Faith in order to make a good society might just as well think they can use the stairs of heaven as a shortcut to the nearest chemist’s shop.”

“God has not been trying an experiment on my faith or love in order to find out their quality. He knew it already. It was I who didn’t. In this trial He makes us occupy the dock, the witness box, and the bench all at once. He always knew that my temple was a house of cards. His only way of making me realize the fact was to knock it down.”

CS Lewis Quotes Video Illustration About Love

 

 

CS Lewis Quotes Image Illustration On Love

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Other Famous CS Lewis Quotes

“Since it is so likely that children will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage.”

“Joy is the serious business of heaven.”

“We laugh at honor and are shocked to find traitors in our midst.”

“There is but one good; that is God. Everything else is good when it looks to Him and bad when it turns from Him.”

“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.”

“Each day we are becoming a creature of splendid glory or one of unthinkable horror.”

Jesus Christ did not say, “Go into all the world and tell the world that it is quite right”

“The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles but to irrigate deserts.”

“The homemaker has the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose only – and that is to support the ultimate career. ”

“The truth is, of course, that what one regards as interruptions are precisely one’s life.”

“The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.”

“I sometimes wonder if all pleasures are not substitutes for joy.”

There are only two kinds of people: those who say to God, “Thy will be done,” and those to whom God says, “All right, then, have it your way.”

“A pleasure is not full grown until it is remembered.”

“It’s so much easier to pray for a bore than to go and see one.”

“The terrible thing, the almost impossible thing, is to hand over your whole self–all your wishes and precautions–to Christ.”

“No man knows how bad he is till he has tried very hard to be good.”

“Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different…”

“When we Christians behave badly, or fail to behave well, we are making Christianity unbelievable to the outside world.”

“If a man thinks he is not conceited, he is very conceited indeed.”

“All get what they want; they do not always like it.”

“[Reality] is not neat, not obvious, not what you expect.”

“It is safe to tell the pure in heart that they shall see God, for only the pure in heart want to.”

“All their life in this world and all their adventures in Narnia had only been the cover and the title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before.”

“Thirst was made for water; inquiry for truth.”

“The sun looks down on nothing half so good as a household laughing together over a meal.”

“Forgiveness does not mean excusing”

“Miracles are a retelling in small letters of the very same story which is written across the whole world in letters too large for some of us to see.”

“This was the very reason why you were brought to Narnia, that by knowing me here for a little, you may know me better there.”
Source:“The Voyage of the Dawn Treader” (1952)

“God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.”

“Nothing you have not given away will ever really be yours.”

“We do not want merely to see beauty . . . We want something else which can hardly be put into words – to be united with the beauty we see, to pass into it, to receive it into ourselves, to bathe in it, to become part of it.”

“You may forget that you are at every moment totally dependent on God.”

“What you see and what you hear depends a great deal on where you are standing. It also depends on what sort of person you are.”

“Readers are advised to remember that the devil is a liar.”

“No man knows how bad he is till he has tried very hard to be good.”

“The instrument through which you see God is your whole self. And if a man’s self is not kept clean and bright, his glimpse of God will be blurred”

“A man can no more diminish God’s glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word ‘darkness’ on the walls of his cell.”

“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.”

“The door on which we have been knocking all our lives will open at last.”

Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”

“The Past is frozen and no longer flows, and the Present is all lit up with eternal rays.”

“If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world.”

“God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks to us in our conscience, but shouts in our pains; it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”

“I have learned now that while those who speak about one’s miseries usually hurt, those who keep silence hurt more.”

“When Christ died, he died for you individually just as much as if you had been the only person in the world.”

“In our own case we accept excuses too easily; in other people’s, we do not accept them easily enough.”

“If God forgives us we must forgive ourselves otherwise its like setting up ourselves as a higher tribunal than him.”

“All these toys were never intended to possess my heart. My true good is in another world, and my only real treasure is Christ.”

“When we lose one blessing, another is often most unexpectedly given in its place.”

“No good work is done anywhere without aid from the Father of Lights.”

“God, who foresaw your tribulation, has specially armed you to go through it, not without pain but without stain.”

“We may ignore, but we can nowhere evade, the presence of God. The world is crowded with him. He walks everywhere incognito.”

“To walk out of his will is to walk into nowhere.”

“Faith in Christ is the only thing to save you from despair.”

“Of all the bad men, religious bad men are the worst.”

“One road leads home and a thousand roads lead into the wilderness.”

“Relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing had yet been done.”

“Someday you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again.”

“If God had granted all the silly prayers I’ve made in my life, where should I be now?”

“Once in our world, a stable had something in it that was bigger than our whole world.”

“It is not your business to succeed, but to do right; when you have done so, the rest lies with God.”

“Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted in spite of your changing moods.”

“If you’re thinking of becoming a Christian, I warn you, you’re embarking on something, which will take the whole of you.”

“Now is our chance to choose the right side. God is holding back to give us that chance. It won’t last forever. We must take it or leave it.”

“You must ask for God’s help. … After each failure, ask forgiveness, pick yourself up, and try again.”

“Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither.”

“When all the suns and nebulae have passed away, each one of you will still be alive.”

“When you are arguing against God you are arguing against the very power that makes you able to argue at all.”

“We’re not doubting that God will do the best for us; we’re wondering how painful the best will turn out to be.”

“God has infinite attention to spare for each one of us. You are as much alone with him as if you were the only being he had ever created.”

“God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.”

“We regard God as an airman regards his parachute; it’s there for emergencies, but he hopes he’ll never have to use it.”

“If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.”

“It cost God nothing, so far as we know, to create nice things: but to convert rebellious wills cost him crucifixion.”

“The heart never takes the place of the head: but it can, and should, obey it.”

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”

“There would be no sense in saying you trusted Jesus if you would not take his advice.”

“God intends to give us what we need, not what we now think we want.”

“Human history is the long terrible story of man trying to find something other than God which will make him happy.”

“God allows us to experience the low points of life in order to teach us lessons that we could learn in no other way.”

“Christianity, if false, is of no importance and, if true, is of infinite importance. The one thing it cannot be is moderately important.”

“Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next man.”

“If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don’t recommend Christianity.”

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less.”

“To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.”

“The Son of God became a man to enable men to become sons of God.”

“I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen — not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.”

 

Quotes About Change And Moving On

Quotes About Change And Moving On – You are changing. The universe around you is changing. Just because something was right for you in the past doesn’t mean it still is. This could be a relationship, a job, a home, a habit, etc.

It happens to you slowly as you grow. You discover more about who you are and what you want out of life, and then you realize there are deliberate changes you need to make to keep up with the changes happening around you and within you.

The lifestyle you’ve been living no longer fits. The specific people and routines you’ve known forever no longer align with your values. So you cherish all the memories, but find yourself letting go and moving on. To strengthen your will, here we give you 150++ quotes about change and moving on. Enjoy!

Quotes About Change And Moving On

Quotes about accepting change and moving on

Be patient, but don’t wait forever for something that isn’t going to happen.

Stop worrying about what you have to loose and start focusing on what you…

I have decided that no matter what is happening in my life, I will choose to…

Maybe it’s not always about trying to fix something broken. Maybe it’s about…

Your life is a result of the choice you make… If you don’t like your life, it is time…

Giving up doesn’t always mean you are weak. Sometimes, it means that you are…

Even if you fall on your face, you’re still moving forward.

Moving on doesn’t mean you forget about things. It just mean you have to…

Getting knocked down in life is a given. Getting up and moving forward is…

The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going…

From this day on, when I look back on the past, I will smile and say to…

Shit happens. But life goes on.

In the process of letting go, you will lose many things from the past, but you…

Mistake is a single page in a part of life, but relation is a book of dictionary. So…

Is it not strange that we can for one moment lose sight of heaven, and the…

Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their…

Never regret anything that has happened in you life. It cannot be undone…

People change, things go wrong. Shit happens, but life goes on.

Just because you miss someone doesn’t mean you need them back in your…

For me, life is continuously being hungry. The meaning of life is not simply…

Life never stops moving forward. Stay focused and never slow down because…

It is always important to know when something has reached its ends. Closing…

Moving on is a simple thing, what it leaves behind is hard.

If you can’t fly, then run. If you can’t run, then walk. If you can’t walk, then…

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.

No matter how bad you think, you have it positive. Life goes on, you will get…

There are far better things ahead that any we leave behind.

Sometimes, we need to forget some people from our past because of one…

It is important that we forgive ourselves for making mistakes. We need to…

Sometimes, to move forward in life, we need to turn around. It doesn’t mean…

Laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go of what you can’t…

Don’t look back. You’re not going that way.

When there is no turning back, we should concern ourselves only with the best…

What’s done is done, what’s gone is gone. One of life’s lessons is always…

Don’t waste your time looking back at what you’ve lost. Move on, life is not…

Get going. Move forward. Aim high. Plan a takeoff. Don’t just sit on the…

Let today be the day you learn the grace of letting go and the power of moving…

No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and fight for your dreams.

Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers…

It hurts to let go, but sometimes it hurts more to hold on.

Forget what hurt you in the past. But never forget what it taught you.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can…

In three words, I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life. It goes on.

Sometimes you have to move on without certain people. If they’re meant to be…

It is important that we forgive ourselves for making mistakes. We need to…

It ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep…

Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.

You must make a decision that you are going to move on. It won’t happen…

If you want something you’ve never had, then you’ve got to do something…

Around here, we don’t look backwards for very long… We keep moving…

The mental and physical space we create by letting go of things that belong in…

Sometimes, it’s very hard to move on, but once you move on, you’ll realize it…

Famous quotes about change and moving on

The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.
Steve Maraboli

Forget what hurt you but never forget what it taught you.
Shannon L. Alder

If you want to fly in the sky, you need to leave the earth. If you want to move forward, you need to let go the past that drags you down.
Amit Ray

In the process of letting go, you will lose many things from the past, but you will find yourself.
Deepak Chopra

Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.
Herman Hesse

The only thing a person can ever really do is keep moving forward. Take that big leap forward without hesitation, without once looking back. Simply forget the past and forge toward the future.
Alyson Noel

We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.
Walt Disney

When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need.
Tao Te Ching

A bridge can still be built, while the bitter waters are flowing beneath.
Anthony Liccione

Holding on is believing that there’s only a past; letting go is knowing that there’s a future.
Daphne Rose Kingma

To let go is to release the images and emotions, the grudges and fears, the clingings and disappointments of the past that bind our spirit.
Jack Kornfield

I think that the power is the principle. The principle of moving forward, as though you have the confidence to move forward, eventually gives you confidence when you look back and see what you’ve done.
Robert Downey Jr.

Sooner or later we’ve all got to let go of our past.
Dan Brown

You’ve got to make a conscious choice every day to shed the old – whatever “the old” means for you.
Sarah Ban Breathnach

Don’t dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energy moving forward together towards an answer.
Denis Waitley

Even if you fall on your face, you’re still moving forward.
Victor Kiam

If everyone is moving forward together, then success takes care of itself.
Henry Ford

Sometimes the hardest part isn’t letting go but rather learning to start over.
Nicole Sobon

We can’t be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don’t have something better.
C. JoyBell C.

Life moves on and so should we.
Spencer Johnson

Change has to come for life to struggle forward.
Helen Hollick

Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.
Raymond Lindquist

What happens when you let go when your strength leaves you and you sink into darkness, when there’s nothing that you or anyone else can do, no matter how desperate you are, no matter how you try? Perhaps it’s then, when you have neither pride nor power, that you are saved, brought to an unimaginably great reward.
Mark Halperin

Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.
Deborah Reber

Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.
Ann Lander

There’s an important difference between giving up and letting go.
Jessica Hatchigan

Forgiveness means letting go of the past.
Gerald Jampolsky

Never love something so much that you can’t let go of it.
Ginni Rometty

It is important that we forgive ourselves for making mistakes. We need to learn from our errors and move on.
Steve Maraboli

Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.
Steve Maraboli

Sometimes you have to take a step back to move forward.
Erika Taylor

Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
Dalai Lama

Sometimes the door closes on a relationship, not because we failed but because something bigger than us says this no longer fits our life. So, lock the door, shed a tear, turn around and look for the new door that’s opened. It’s a sign that you’re no longer that person you were, it’s time to change into who you are. It’s going to be okay.
Lee Goff

Broken hearts hurt but they will make you strong.
Unknown

Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.
Oprah Winfrey

We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
Joseph Campbell

You don’t need strength to let go of something. What you really need is understanding.
Guy Finley

Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more open.
Ralph Marston

Letting go does not mean you stop caring. It means you stop trying to force others to.
Mandy Hale

If you want to forget something or someone, never hate it, or never hate him/her. Everything and everyone that you hate is engraved upon your heart; if you want to let go of something, if you want to forget, you cannot hate.
C. JoyBell C.

You can only lose what you cling to.
Buddha

Change can be good but its always tough to let go of the past.
Emily Giffin

When we think we have been hurt by someone in the past, we build up defenses to protect ourselves from being hurt in the future. So the fearful past causes a fearful future and the past and future become one. We cannot love when we feel fear…. When we release the fearful past and forgive everyone, we will experience total love and oneness with all.
Gerald G. Jampolsky

Life moves forward. The old leaves wither, die and fall away, and the new growth extends forward into the light.
Bryant McGill

Suffering is not holding you. You are holding suffering. When you become good at the art of letting sufferings go, then you’ll come to realize how unnecessary it was for you to drag those burdens around with you. You’ll see that no one else other than you was responsible. The truth is that existence wants your life to become a festival.
Osho

Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.
Steve Maraboli

You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.
C. JoyBell C.

Sometimes it takes a heartbreak to shake us awake and help us see we are worth so much more than we’re settling for.
Mandy Hale

Renew, release, let go. Yesterday’s gone. There’s nothing you can do to bring it back. You can’t “should’ve” done something. You can only DO something. Renew yourself. Release that attachment. Today is a new day!
Steve Maraboli

Let go. Why do you cling to pain? There is nothing you can do about the wrongs of yesterday. It is not yours to judge. Why hold on to the very thing which keeps you from hope and love?
Leo Buscaglia

Even on my weakest days I get a little bit stronger
Sara Evans

The day I understood everything, was the day I stopped trying to figure everything out. The day I knew peace was the day I let everything go.
C. JoyBell C.

It’s hard to be clear about who you are when you are carrying around a bunch of baggage from the past. I’ve learned to let go and move more quickly into the next place.
Angelina Jolie

All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.
Havelock Ellis

I demolish my bridges behind me… then there is no choice but to move forward.
Fridtjof Nansen

The beautiful journey of today can only begin when we learn to let go of yesterday.
Steve Maraboli

There’s a trick to the Graceful Exit. It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, a relationship is over – and to let go. It means leaving what’s over without denying its value.
Ellen Goodman

Today expect something good to happen to you no matter what occurred yesterday. Realize the past no longer holds you captive. It can only continue to hurt you if you hold on to it. Let the past go. A simply abundant world awaits.
Sarah Ban Breathnach

Let go of certainty. The opposite isn’t uncertainty. It’s openness, curiosity and a willingness to embrace paradox, rather than choose up sides. The ultimate challenge is to accept ourselves exactly as we are, but never stop trying to learn and grow.
Tony Schwartz

Pain will leave you when you let go.
Jeremy Aldana

Quotes about change and moving on in life

When I let go
of what I am,
I become
what I might be.
Lao Tzu

(6th century BC, Chinese philosopher)

I never see
what has been done;
I only see
what remains to be done.
Buddha

(c. 400/500 BC, sage from the ancient Shakya republic)

Declare the past,
diagnose the present,
foretell the future.
Hippocrates of Cos

(c.460 – c.370 BC, Greek physician)

Cowards die many times
before their actual deaths.
Gaius Julius Caesar

(c.140 – 85 BC, Roman senator,
and father of Julius Caesar)

It’s not
what happens to you,
but how you react to it
that matters.
Epictetus

(55 – 135, Greek sage, and philosopher)

It is not death
that a man should fear,
but he should fear
never beginning to live.
Marcus Aurelius

(121 – 180, Roman Emperor)

It is not enough
just to wish well;
we must also do well.
Saint Ambrose

(c.340 – 397, archbishop of Milan)

The price of inaction
is far greater
than the cost
of making a mistake.
Meister Eckhart

(1260 – 1327, German theologian and philosopher)

Happiness is not
something ready made.
It comes
from your own actions.
Dalai Lama

(1357 – 1419, high lama of Tibetan Buddhism)

Every failure
is a step to success.
William Whewell

(1794 – 1866, English polymath,
scientist, Anglican priest, philosopher,
theologian, and historian of science)

Go as far
as you can see;
when you get there
you’ll be able
to see farther.
Thomas Carlyle

(1795 – 1881, Scottish philosopher,
historian, and teacher)

Life can only
be understood backwards;
but it must be
lived forwards.
Søren Aabye Kierkegaard

(1813 – 1855, Danish philosopher,
social critic, and author)

Progress,
of the best kind,
is comparatively slow.
Great results
cannot be achieved at once;
and we must be satisfied
to advance in life
as we walk,
step by step.
Samuel Smiles

(1812 – 1904, Scottish biographer and author)

To change one’s life:
Start immediately.
Do it flamboyantly.
William James

(1842 – 1910, American philosopher and psychologist)

He who would learn
to fly one day
must first learn to stand,
and walk, and run,
and climb, and dance;
one cannot fly into flying.
Friedrich Nietzsche

(1844 – 1900, German philosopher,
poet, and philologist)

Always forgive your enemies
– nothing annoys them so much.
Oscar Wilde

(1854 – 1900, Anglo-Irish dramatist and poet)

It is only through labor
and painful effort,
by grim energy
and resolute courage,
that we move on
to better things.
Theodore Roosevelt

(1858 – 1919, 26th President of the United States)

I demolish
my bridges behind me
…then there is no choice
but to move forward.
Fridtjof Nansen

(1861 – 1930, Norwegian explorer,
scientist, diplomat, humanitarian
and Nobel Peace Prize laureate)

Life is
like riding a bicycle.
To keep your balance
you must keep moving.
Albert Einstein

(1879 – 1955, German-born theoretical physicist)

Living is
a constant process
of deciding
what we are going to do.
José Ortega y Gasset

(1883 – 1955, Spanish liberal philosopher, and essayist)

Achievement seems to be
connected with action.
Successful men and women
keep moving.
They make mistakes,
but they don’t quit.
Conrad Hilton

(1887 – 1979, American hotelier)

A man will be
imprisoned in a room
with a door
that’s unlocked
and opens inwards;
as long as it does not
occur to him
to pull
rather than push.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

(1889 – 1951, Austrian-British philosopher)

Man maintains his balance,
poise, and sense of security
only as he is
moving forward.
Maxwell Maltz

(1889 – 1975, American cosmetic surgeon,
and author of Psycho-Cybernetics)

We keep moving forward,
opening new doors,
and doing new things,
because we’re curious
and curiosity keeps leading us
down new paths.
Walter Elias “Walt” Disney

(1901 – 1966, American business magnate)

Not to engage
in the pursuit of ideas
is to live like ants
instead of like men.
Mortimer Adler

(1902 – 2001, American philosopher and educator)

The only way
to make sense
out of change
is to plunge into it,
move with it,
and join the dance.
Alan Watts

(1915 – 1973, English philosopher,
writer, and speaker)

Change is the law of life.
And those
who look only
to the past or present
are certain
to miss the future.
John F. Kennedy,
commonly known as JFK

(1917 – 1963, 35th President of the US)

Forget the past.
Nelson Mandela

1918 – 2013, South African anti-apartheid revolutionary)

If you can’t fly
then run,
if you can’t run
then walk,
if you can’t walk
then crawl,
but whatever you do
you have to keep
moving forward.
Martin Luther King, Jr.

(1929 – 1968, American clergyman, activist,
humanitarian, and leader in
the African-American Civil Rights Movement)

Don’t dwell
on what went wrong.
Instead,
focus on what to do next.
Spend your energies
on moving forward
toward finding the answer.
Denis E. Waitley

(*1933, American motivational author and consultant)

Every exit
is an entry somewhere.
Tom Stoppard

(*1937, Czech-born British playwright and screenwriter)

If you do not
create your destiny,
you will have
your fate
inflicted upon you.
William Irwin Thompson

(*1938, American social philosopher and cultural critic)

Life moves on
and so should we.
Spencer Johnson

(*1940, known for his book Who Moved My Cheese?)

Part of being a winner
is knowing
when enough is enough.
Sometimes you have to give up
the fight and walk away,
and move on to something
that’s more productive.
Donald John Trump, Sr.

(*1946, American business magnate)

Even though
you may want to move
forward in your life,
you may have one foot
on the brakes.
In order to be free,
we must learn how to let go.
Release the hurt.
Release the fear.
Refuse to entertain
your old pain.
The energy it takes
to hang onto the past
is holding you back
from a new life.
What is it
you would let go of today?
Mary Manin Morrissey

(*1949, American former New Thought minister from Oregon)

You are responsible
for your life.
You can’t keep blaming
somebody else
for your dysfunction.
Life is really
about moving on.
Oprah Gail Winfrey

(*1954, American media proprietor,
actress, and producer)

To help yourself,
you must be yourself.
Be the best
that you can be.
When you make a mistake,
learn from it,
pick yourself up,
and move on.
Dave Pelzer

(*1960, American autobiographer)

Moving on,
is a simple thing,
what it leaves behind
is hard.
David Scott “Dave” Mustaine

(*1961, American musician)

You can’t start
the next chapter
of your life
if you keep re-reading
your last one.
Michael McMillan

(American author and creative thinking consultant)

You must make
a decision
that you are going
to move on.
It won’t happen
automatically.
You will have
to rise up and say,
‘I don’t care
how hard this is,
I don’t care
how disappointed I am,
I’m not going to
let this get the best of me.
I’m moving on
with my life.’
Joel Osteen,
7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential

(*1963, American preacher, televangelist, and author)

Moving on is easy.
It’s staying moved on
that’s trickier.
Katerina Stoykova Klemer

(*1971, Bulgarian-American poet)

You can spend minutes,
hours, days, weeks,
or even months
over-analyzing a situation;
trying
to put the pieces together,
justifying
what could’ve,
would’ve happened…
or you can just
leave the pieces on the floor
and move the fuck on.
Tupac Amaru Shakur

(1971 – 1996, also known by
his stage names 2Pac and Makaveli, American rapper)

It is important
that we forgive ourselves
for making mistakes.
We need to learn
from our errors
and move on.
Steve Maraboli,
Life, the Truth, and Being Free

(*1975, behavioural scientist)

My Mama always said
you’ve got to put
the past behind you
before you can move on.
Forrest Gump

(1994 American comedy-drama film)

Sometimes moving on
can be hard and hurts,
but holding on to something
that can never be
is even harder and hurtful.
Blaze Olamiday

(Nigerian writer, Twitter account: @Neyo_Mane)

Life is
about making
the right decisions
and moving on.
Unknown author

Do not worry
if you feel low;
the sun
has a sinking spell every night,
but rises again all right
the next morning.
Unknown author

If you don’t
take the risk,
you might as well
have never lived at all.
Don’t waste your life,
take chances,
and make changes.
It’s what we were all
made to do.
Unknown author

Giving up
is not a symbol
of being weak,
at times
it can show
that you are smart enough
to have the courage
to move on.
Unknown author

Don’t waste your time
looking back
for what you have lost,
move on,
life isn’t meant
to be travelled backwards.
Unknown author

What’s done is done,
what’s gone is gone.
One of life’s lessons
is always moving on.
It is ok to look back
and think of fond memories,
but keep moving forward
and you will live
your life happily.
Unknown author

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Quotes About Change And Moving On by Tony Robbins Video

 

Moving On Quotes – BrainyQuote
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Aug 11, 2014 – Here are 75 quotes about happiness that can do just that Tweet them In the adaptability and ease with which we experience change, lies our happiness and freedom ” Buddha Life is really about moving on ” Oprah
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Selfie Quotes For Instagram, 200++ Quotes For Your Best Selfie Caption

Selfie Quotes For Instagram – You may not be incredibly creative but with a little work and effort you can become great at creating your very own captions for your photos. It takes a little bit of time and effort to get the hang of it, but eventually you will find they come easier and easier.When in doubt, try again and again.

If you’re not great at it, don’t just choose the quote that first comes to mind. Try to think of your favorite 3 and bounce them off of your friends to see what they think is the best one. But if you still find it’s difficult, just these quotes on your instagram caption. Make sure the photo is match enough with the caption. Enjoy.

Selfie Quotes For Instagram

Cute selfie quotes for instagram

1) I don’t always take selfies.

2) Sending my selfie to NASA, because I’m a star.

3) I was born to stand out.

4) Selfie Sunday.

5) The best part of life is the opportunity to learn something new every day. Just when you think you know it all, you realize you didn’t know a thing.

6) Maybe she’s born with it.

7) You’re the king, baby I’m your queen.

8) These are the days we live for.

9) Stop being a zombie. Find something that you’re excited about in your life; otherwise you’re just walking dead.

10) Don’t allow your habitual behavior to dictate who you truly are.

11) Life is better when you’re laughing.

12) Always classy, never trashy, and a little bit sassy.

13) That annoying moment when you take a selfie, and your hair looks perfect but your face looks horrific.

14) Some things are better in dreams.

15) Why so serious?

16) The best mistake to never repeat is to never cry for the same problem twice.

17) Cinderella never asked for a prince.

18) People won’t always love you. They may love what you bring to the table and love what you may do for them, but that doesn’t mean they love you. Learn the difference, my friends.

19) There’s a girl out there with love in her eyes and flowers in her hair.

20) Even the most beautiful women will have at least some insecurity, whether they admit it or not.

Clever selfie quotes for instagram

21) Text me back or I’ll find you.

22) Insecurities can make even the smartest and most beautiful woman foolishly question herself despite how amazing she truly is.

23) If you have eyes, look at me now!

24) Show anyone and I’ll kill you.

25) I’d rather laugh with the sinners.

26) I’m everything you want but can’t have.

27) It’s sexy time.

28) Learn to appreciate the people who want to be in your life and stop stressing over people who don’t want to be in your life.

29) Don’t hold your breath.

30) It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks of me because I know who I am, and I am damn proud of it.

31) Life is like a box of chocolate; sometimes you just dig out the good center parts and leave all the undesirable rest to waste.

32) Never love anyone who treats you like you’re ordinary.

33) Oh hey there.

34) Sunday funday.

35) People will judge you without knowing who you are, people will wish you bad things without knowing your story, but you don’t have to listen to them. They are not better than you.

36) If you really love someone, you would not purposely do something to hurt that person.

37) Start by changing your thoughts; finish by changing your life.

38) Dime piece.

39) Every path has obstacles, but it is up to you to continue to smile and walk that path.

40) Take a ride on my energy.

Simple quotes for instagram selfie

41) You don’t have to jump high for people to like you, love you, want to be with you, and notice you. You just have to be yourself, and you will be accepted for who you are.

42) You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

43) Morning boys.

44) Don’t let your eyes be blinded by her beauty.

45) You’re never going to have me.

46) When a man is truly passionate about his woman, he will do whatever it takes to ensure her happiness with him.

47) Always learn to stand on your own two feet or watch how you will crawl forever.

48) Before spending time trying to find someone, you must first find yourself.

49) The question isn’t can you, it’s will you?

50) What day is it again?

51) Don’t allow anyone to take the wheel and steer you in their direction because you will never truly be happy. Take control of your own life.

52) Regardless of whatever crap life may throw at you, never stop having a moment filled with fun!

53) Best. Selfie. Ever.

54) Catch a glimpse.

55) Let it be.

56) I’m the girl you’ve always wanted.

57) Dear guys, please get off of Facebook, take yourself outside, be a gentleman, and learn how to approach a woman in the real world, preferably one

who is single and available.

58) Like it or not, you will eventually become a reflection of the company you keep.

59) Don’t hate.

60) But first, let me take a selfie.

Best selfie quotes for instagram

61) Keep telling yourself good isn’t good enough. You deserve much more. You deserve GREATNESS.

62) You don’t know me.

63) Take me out.

64) There is no such thing as a perfect person, but someone’s heart can have the perfect intention.

65) You do you.

66) When people leave, they take pieces of you with them that you may never get back.

67) Wish you were here.

68) How bad do you want it.

69) I don’t need your approval to be me.

70) I woke up like this.

71) Take yourself seriously and others will have no choice but to follow your example and treat you in the same manner you treat yourself.

72) I can show you the world.

73) What do you think of the view?

74) Hey girl!

75) The same way some of you fellas are drooling over the next girl, don’t forget there’s a line of dudes drooling over your girl.

76) What have I become.

77) Happiness is just a chemical.

78) I’ll do me.

79) My time is now.

80) There’s nothing wrong with being an amateur. Each and every one of us has had to start from somewhere.

81) Hating me doesn’t make you pretty.

82) It’s not a phase mom, it’s who I am.

83) Just because you’re awake doesn’t mean you should stop dreaming.

84) Don’t let anyone tell you that you’re not strong enough.

85) I gave her my heart but she wanted my soul.

86) Be yourself, there’s no one better.

87) It’s so beautiful when a boy smiles.

88) Last night was a blur.

89) I am who I am, I am what I am, I do what I do and I ain’t never gonna do it any different. I don’t care who likes it and who don’t.

90) The most important thing is to enjoy your life – to be happy – it’s all that matters.

91) Take every chance you get in life, because some things only happen once.

92) I myself never feel that I’m sexy. If people call me cute, I am happier.

93) Women drivers rev my engine

94) I like foodies

95) Hey, I just met you, this is crazy

96) At least this balloon is attracted to me!

97) I must destroy you with hugs and kisses

98) Stop looking for happiness in the same place you just lost it.

99) I woke up like this

100) If we could only turn back time…

Selfie quotes for instagram for guys

101) Keep smiling because life is a beautiful thing and there’s so much to smile about.

102) Beauty is power, a smile is it’s sword

103) My autobiography is this

104) Last day of class

105) Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive

106) Chilling like a gangster.

107) I know I’m lucky that I’m so cute.

108) Some days start better than others.

109) Truth is, I’m crazy for you. And everyone can see that but you.

110) Sometimes life can surprise you with a happy coincidence

111) One does not simply “Let it go”.

112) Is Google a boy or a girl? Obviously a girl because it won’t let you finish your sentence without suggesting other ideas.

113) It’s so beautiful when a boy smiles.

114) Don’t be like the rest of them, darling.

115) Girl, I have to call you back.

116) Have a seat, we were expecting you.

117) I’ve finally counted.

118) OMG that’s so cute.

119) Life isn’t perfect..But my Hair is!

120) If I like my art why should it be anyone else’s decision how “good” or “bad” it is. Art shouldn’t have a grade. If I’m proud of it and what I accomplished why should anyone else tell me it isn’t good enough?

Selfie sunday quotes for instagram

121) I think you are lacking vitamin me!

122) When Instagram was down, I ran around town shouting “like” at flowers, dogs, and expensive brunches.

123) Say “Beer Can” with a British accent. I just taught you to say “Bacon” with a Jamaican accent.

124) I don’t always study, but when I do, I don’t.

125) I’ll never try to fit in. I was born to STAND OUT.

126) So you’re telling me I have a chance.

127) Walking past a class with your friends in it.

128) I’m not saying it was aliens, but it was Aliens!

129) Yea, dating is cool but have you ever had stuffed crust pizza?

130) Started from the bottom now we’re here.

131) Give me the chocolate and nobody gets hurt.

132) So, you’re on Instagram? You must be an amazing photographer.

133) Onions make me sad. A lot of people don’t realize that.

134) Women drivers rev my engine.

135) Oh you’re a model? What’s your agency, Instagram?

136) I liked memes before they were on Instagram

137) Friday, my second favorite F word.

138) If a dentist makes their money from unhealthy teeth, why would I trust a product 4/5 of them recommend?

139) I didn’t choose the thug life, the thug life chose me

140) Weekend, please don’t leave me.

Dope quotes for instagram selfies

141) Need an ark? I Noah guy.

142) What if I told you, you can eat without posting it on Instagram.

143) I need a six month holiday, twice a year.

144) If I was funny, I would have a good Instagram caption.

145) I don’t always surf the internet, but when I do, eyebrows!

146) A blind man walks into a bar… And a chair… and a table.

147) I had fun once, it was horrible.

148) Always classy, never trashy, and a little bit sassy.

149) Ladies, please.

150) But first, let me take a selfie.

151) Be yourself, there’s no one better.

152) I’m on a date, she isn’t very social.

153) Stay sharp and far from timid.

154) Warning – You might fall in love with me.

155) Be Yourself, everyone else is taken.

156) All I need is Chipotle.

157) Making people unsure about my gender on a daily basis.

158) I broke my own heart just by loving you.

159) I’m your worst nightmare.

160) Love when my bae hugs me like this.

161) Real men don’t take selfies.

162) The question isn’t can you, it’s will you?

163) Girls be like, I love my hair in this pic.

164) I get by with a little help from my friends.

165) “Insert funny caption”

166) Long line at Starbucks, first world problems.

167) Cinderella never asked for a prince.

168) Finals are OVER!!!

169) This is how I look taking a selfie.

170) Fresh out of the shower, no make-up.

Quotes for instagram for selfies

171) This is why we can’t have nice things.

172) What do you think of the view?

173) There’s a girl out there with love in her eyes and flowers in her hair.

174) Don’t let your eyes be blinded by her beauty.

175) The Master of Disguise.

176) So, who ate my food?

177) These are the days we live for.

178) This is my town.

179) This is the most magical pic of your life.

180) Exams Over

181) I’m dying to know: Is it killing you like it’s killing me?

182) I like the way you’re everything I’ve ever wanted.

183) I could dance to this beat forevermore.

184) I got that red lip, classic thing that you like.

185) I make the moves up as I go.

186) We found wonderland — you and I got lost in it.

187) The best people in life are free.

188) We’re happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time.

189) I think when it’s all over, it just comes back in flashes, you know?

190) And I think about summer, all the beautiful times.

191) It’s hard not to find it all a little bittersweet.

192) Wasn’t it beautiful when you believed in everything?

193) Just because you’re clean don’t mean you don’t miss it.

194) Time won’t fly — it’s like I’m paralyzed by it.

195) I’ve found time can heal most anything.

196) “Whole squad on that real shit”

197) I still ride with my day one”

198) “You the best I ever had”

199) “Let’s celebrate with a toast and get lost in tonight”

200) “Twenty-four-hour champagne diet”

201) “Live for today, plan for tomorrow, party tonight”

202) “I’m here for a good time not a long time”

203) “On my worst behavior”

204) “My excuse is that I’m young”

205) “You only live once”

206) “Worrying about your followers, you need to get your dollars up”

207) “I’m up right now and you suck right now”

208) “I’m just saying you could do better”

209) “Think before you come for the great one”

210) “If I die all i know is I’m a mothafuckin’ legend”

211) “Know yourself, know your worth”

212) “Every time you see me I look like I hit the lotto twice”

213) “Call me the referee because I be so official”

214) “Last name ever, first name greatest”

215) “Started from the bottom now we’re here”

216) “Fresher than a pillow with a mint on it”

217) All we want is hot hot boys boys boys.”

218) “So baby raise a glass to mend all the broken hearts of all my wrecked up friends.”

219) “Some girls won’t dance to the beat of the track.”

220) “Stars in our eyes ‘cuz we’re having a good time.”

221) “Put some lipstick on, perfume your neck and slip your high heels on, rinse and curl your hair, loosen your hips and get a dress to wear.”

222) “Don’t tell me I’m less than my freedom.”

223) “I can’t believe I’m telling you this but I’ve had a couple of drinks and…oh my god!”

224) “Write what you want, say what you want ‘bout me, if you’re wondering, know that I’m not sorry.”

225) “I don’t wanna be alone forever, but I love gypsy life.”

226) It’s good to live expensive, you know it.”

227) “Out in the club and I’m sipping’ that bub and you’re not gonna reach my telephone.”

228) “I should’ve left my phone at home ‘cause this is a disaster.”

229) “Get your hot rods ready to rumble ‘cause we’re gonna drink until we die.”

selfie quotes for instagram pictures

 

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Barney Fife Quotes, One of 50 Greatest TV Characters of All Time list

Barney Fife Quotes – is a fictional character in the American television program The Andy Griffith Show, portrayed by comic actor Don Knotts. Barney Fife is a deputy sheriff in the slow paced, sleepy southern community of Mayberry, North Carolina. He appeared in the first five seasons (1960–65) as a main character, and, after leaving the show at the end of season five, made a few guest appearances in the following three color seasons (1965–68). He also appeared in the first episode of the spin-off series Mayberry R.F.D. (1968–1971), and in the 1986 reunion telemovie Return to Mayberry. Additionally, Barney appeared in the Joey Bishop Show episode, “Joey’s Hideaway Cabin” and the first episode of The New Andy Griffith Show.

In 1999, TV Guide ranked him Ninth on its 50 Greatest TV Characters of All Time list.

Barney Fife Quotes

“The Andy Griffith Show: Convicts-at-Large (#3.11)” (1962)
Deputy Barney Fife: [Floyd and he have run out of gas, and in walking about looking for some have arrived at a mountain cabin belonging to wealthy Mr. O’Malley. Barney decides to shout to see if anyone’s home] O’Malley! Charlie! It’s me, Barney Fife!
Floyd Lawson: [Aghast] You shouldn’t call a rich man by his first name!
Deputy Barney Fife: [to Floyd] The Bigger they are, the nicer they are.
[shouting]
Deputy Barney Fife: Hey, Chuck!

 

Deputy Barney Fife: [as seductive as a nervous little guy can be] Let’s you and me dance.
Big Maude Tyler: [Suprised – Barney had refused her before] You kiddin’?
Deputy Barney Fife: No, I’m not.
Big Maude Tyler: What made you change your mind?
Deputy Barney Fife: [REALLY trying to be seductive now] You’re beginnin’ to get to me.

 

Floyd Lawson: How come you’re putting on your uniform?
Deputy Barney Fife: In case we decide to hitchhike.
Floyd Lawson: Oh.
Deputy Barney Fife: In civies I’m a little hard looking.

 

Big Maude Tyler: By rights, I ought to let Naomi curl your hair with this heater.
Jalene Naomi Connors: [excited] Can I, Maude? Can I? I hate men!
Big Maude Tyler: She’s a convicted husband-beater.
Floyd Lawson: [worried] Better watch it, Al.
Deputy Barney Fife: Will you stop callin’ me Al?

 

Convict Sally: [Has mistaken Barney for her old beau Al, because there is a striking resemblance] How I loved that man!
Big Maude Tyler: I thought Al squealed and sent you up.
Convict Sally: [grabs Barney by the hair] RAT!
Deputy Barney Fife: I’m not Al!

 

Deputy Barney Fife: [Maude told him to lie to Andy] Supposing I refuse?
[Maude points the gun at point-blank range at where he and Floyd are sitting. Naomi and Sally hover over the couch, fists at the ready]
Floyd Lawson: Better phone him, Al!

 

Big Maude Tyler: [after she’s arrested] Rat! You dirty Rat! You RAT!
Deputy Barney Fife: You just settle down, sister!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Cyrano Andy (#1.22)” (1961)
Barney Fife: You’re that cats. I-I-I think about cha all the time. Sometimes at breakfast I… stare down at m’ eggs and… I see your face right in there.

 

Andy Taylor: Barney, I declare, I just don’t understand you. You said ’em all fine right there. Now, how come you can’t say the same thing to Thelma Lou?
Barney Fife: Well, I guess the trouble is I can… I can only say ’em to a face like yours, you character.

 

Barney Fife: How would you like it if I tried to steal Ellie away from YOU?
Andy Taylor: Well, um…
Barney Fife: Oh, you don’t think I can, do you?
Andy Taylor: Well, that’s not the point.
Barney Fife: POINT! Well, I CAN! And the funny part is you’re the one that showed me how. All I gotta do is sweet-talk her – and I’ve seen just enough Rock Hudson pictures to know how to do that.

 

Barney Fife: Oh, this is the oldest game in the world – stealin’ your best friend’s girl. Well, four can play at THIS game, buddy.

 

Barney Fife: If it smells, I want it.

 

Ellie Walker: Okay, Barney, what’ll it be.
Barney Fife: Does it have to… BE anything?
Ellie Walker: Well, no. No, you can sit down if you like. I just have this prescription to finish.
Barney Fife: You know the light in here does crazy things to your hair.
Ellie Walker: What?
Barney Fife: Oh, why pretend? I LIKE you, Ellie. You’re my kind o’ woman.
Ellie Walker: What?
Barney Fife: Let’s not try to fight it… baby.
Ellie Walker: Barney Fife, have you been drinking?
Barney Fife: Oh, baby…
Ellie Walker: [slaps his hand] Oh, now stop. I haven’t time for this nonsense. Now-now, stop acting like a juvenile.
Barney Fife: I feel sorry for you, baby. You-you had your chance to fly with me but you wasn’t woman enough. Now the balloon’s gone up without cha.

 

Barney Fife: Well, some of us got it, some of us ain’t.

“The Andy Griffith Show: A Plaque for Mayberry (#1.25)” (1961)
Andy Taylor: Well, Barney, I believe a sobriety test is given to a prisoner when you first bring him in. Now, you ought to have done that to Otis last night.
Barney Fife: Aw, Andy, you know we couldn’t have given a sobriety test to Otis last night.
Andy Taylor: Well, why not?
Barney Fife: He was too drunk.

 

Barney Fife: Now, I’m gonna test your reactions and your reflexes.
Otis Campbell: This jail’s gettin’ to be as bad as home.

 

Barney Fife: Now, this is a chart of Nathan Tibb’s family tree.
Andy Taylor: Where’d you get this?
Barney Fife: Over at the library.
Andy Taylor: You mean, this whole thing was in the library?
Barney Fife: Well, not the whole thing. Just the start of it. The rest I deduced.
Andy Taylor: Oh, you deduced?
Barney Fife: Yeah. It deduces right out to me. Me, Barney Fife. I almost started to cry right in the library.

 

Barney Fife: I can just see Otis showin’ up for that plaque now.
Barney Fife: [acting drunk] “Where’s m’ plaque? Gimme m’ plaque,” then he’ll stagger up to that Mrs. Wicks and he’ll say “How about a little drink, baby?”

 

Barney Fife: We’re gettin’ the real thing – Otis Campbell himself.
Mayor Pike: What?
Barney Fife: The hundred percent Otis Campbell – or should I say “hundred proof?”

 

Mayor Pike: I specifically asked you to get us a substitute for him, but you didn’t! You got HIM.
Andy Taylor: You did, and I didn’t, but I did.
Mayor Pike: How could you do it?
Barney Fife: Well, he did.
Mayor Pike: You didn’t.
Andy Taylor: I did.
Mayor Pike: How?
Andy Taylor: I just did.

 

Barney Fife: You s’pose we ought to put a plaque in that cell there – “Otis Campbell slept here?”
Andy Taylor: “Slept it off here”‘d be more like it.
“The Simpsons: Days of Wine and D’oh’ses (#11.18)” (2000)
Barney Gumble: Moe, I’ve come here to make amends for my disgraceful behaviour over the last twenty years.
Moe: No, that’s okay, Barn.
Barney Gumble: No it’s not okay. I broke barstools, befouled your broom closet, and made sweet love to your pool table, which I then befouled.
Moe: Well, that would explain the drop-off in play.

 

Barney: What do you mean I forgot my birthday? How could I forget…
[chugs a beer glass]
Barney: – my own birthday?

 

[Barney and Homer are in a helicopter, when they land in the middle of a bridge and stop a beer truck. A six pack falls out]
Barney: Beer! That’s what I need!
Barney: Barney, no! Don’t!
Barney: Yes! I need it.
Homer, Barney: [Barney opens the beer can and starts to drink, but Homer grabs his arm]
Homer: No! You’ve gotta be sober for this. Give me that.
Homer: [starts chugging the beer] Ew, it’s warm.
Barney: You can’t drink ’em all.
Homer: Oh, yes, I can.
[Homer wrestles Barney for the rest of the six-pack and chugs it]
Homer: I won’t let you give up now, when you worked so hard…
[slurring]
Homer: …to be the greatest pal in the world. I love you. Let’s not lose touch after graduation.
[passes out]
Barney: You brave man. You took six silver bullets for me.
Homer: Stay away from my wife!

 

Barney: So, I say, when we die there should be two planets- one for the French and one for the Chinese.

 

Barney Gumble: I’m just saying that when we die there’s gonna be a planet for the french, a planet for the chinese, and we’ll all be a lot happier.
Lisa: Mr. Gumble, you’re upsetting me.
Barney Gumble: No, I’m not.

 

Barney Gumble: Moe, I’ve come here to make amends for my disgraceful behavior over the last twenty years.
Moe: Oh, that’s okay, Barn.
Barney Gumble: No, it’s not okay. I broke barstools, befouled your broom closet and made sweet love to your pool table, which I then befouled.
Moe: Well, that would explain the drop-off in play.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Quiet Sam (#1.29)” (1961)
Floyd Lawson: He cuts his own hair.
Barney Fife: He tell you that?
Floyd Lawson: Didn’t have to. I can spot an amateur head a mile off.

 

Barney Fife: Don’t look at him. He’ll know we’re talkin’ him.
[pause]
Barney Fife: What’s he doin’ now?
Floyd Lawson: I don’t know. You told me not to look at him.

 

Barney Fife: Well, for my money, he’s got all the facial characteristics of a criminal. You know, the… the narrow chin, and the eyes close together, and… slack jaw with a prominent overbite.
Andy Taylor: You know who that sounds like?
Barney Fife: Who?
Andy Taylor: You.

 

Barney Fife: Boy, you wouldn’t notice a muddy elephant in the snow, would ya?
Andy Taylor: You tryin’ to tell me Sam Becker’s got a dirty elephant to his place?

 

Barney Fife: Yeah, Sam, I did my part in helpin’ to whip the dreaded hun.

 

Barney Fife: You sure didn’t freeze up on THIS little grasshopper.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Merchant of Mayberry (#2.22)” (1962)
Barney Fife: [angry] Oh, boy, you’re just full of fun today, aren’t ya? Why don’t we go up to the old people’s home and wax the steps?

 

Barney Fife: How are ya?
Bert Miller: Middlin’.

 

Andy Taylor: Whadda ya… whadda ya sellin’ these days, Bert? Anything?
Bert Miller: Oh, this and that.
Andy Taylor: Well, like what.
Bert Miller: Oh, first one thing, then another.
Andy Taylor: Well, what’s in the suitcase?
Bert Miller: Different things.
Barney Fife: For Pete’s sake, Bert. Open it up. We might buy somethin’ off of ya.
Bert Miller: Oh, you probably don’t need nothin’ no way, and I don’t wanna appear pushy.
Andy Taylor: [chuckles] Oh, nobody’ll ever accuse you of that, Bert. Now-now, what’s in the suitcase? Show us.

 

Aunt Bee Taylor: [to Bert] What have you got in your suitcase?
Andy Taylor: [imitating Bert’s style] Oh, he’s got, first, one thing, then another in there, Aunt Bee.
Barney Fife: [joining in] What about different things?
Andy Taylor: I forgot different things, and a whole lot of this ‘n’ that.
Barney Fife: Oh, I don’t know. I think Aunt Bee’d like one thing and another.
Andy Taylor: Hard to tell – either that or different things.
Barney Fife: Yeah.
Aunt Bee Taylor: What’re you talking about?
Andy Taylor: Now look here, Aunt Bee, it’s either gonna be socks, razor blades, or first one thing and then another. Now, we ain’t got time to stand around here while you make up your mind. We’re busy.

 

Barney Fife: Why don’t you go set in the grocery store so we can all know you’re the big cheese?

 

Barney Fife: I’ll tell you one thing, you’re gettin’ the best salesman in Mayberry.
Ben Weaver: Uh-uh. Second best.
Barney Fife: Huh? Well, who’s the best?
Ben Weaver: You oughta know. You’re workin’ for ‘im.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy and Barney in the Big City (#2.25)” (1962)
[Barney picks up Andy’s suitcase]
Andy Taylor: Uh, careful. There’s a bottle in there.
Barney Fife: You thought of everything, didn’t ya?

 

Aunt Bee Taylor: Oh, no, wait a moment! We almost forgot!
[exits to the kitchen]
Barney Fife: What’d she forget?
Andy Taylor: Well, I’ll bet you a quarter she forgot a brown paper sack full of sandwiches. I never been on a trip in my life I didn’t have to carry a brown paper sack full of sandwiches.

 

Hotel Clerk: [presenting room keys] Here you are, Mr. Taylor, and Mr. Fife. Excuse me – “Doctor” Fife.
Andy Taylor: “Doctor” Fife?
Hotel Clerk: [reading registration card] “Bernard Fife, M.D.”
Andy Taylor: M.D.?
Barney Fife: That’s the way I always sign. Bernard Fife, M.D.
Barney Fife: [pressured under Andy’s gaze] Mayberry Deputy.

 

Andy Taylor: Now, Barn, outside of that meetin’ we got with the commissioner, we’re-we’re really off duty, you know?
Barney Fife: Off duty? Huh. Now, when is a lawman REALLY off duty?

 

[Andy signals the maître d’ to interpret the French menu]
Barney Fife: Don’t do that, Andy. You’ll embarrass me. He’ll think you’re just a plain hick.
Andy Taylor: Well, Barney, there’s worse things than bein’ a plain hick, like bein’ a hungry one.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Crime-Free Mayberry (#2.7)” (1961)
Barney Fife: [Barney, writing a song to the tune of Clementine, doesn’t know Andy is standing behind him] In a jailhouse down in Dixie / Fightin’ crime and riskin’ life / Dwelled a sheriff and his buddy / Pistol-packing Barny Fife. / Oh my darin’, oh my darin’ / Oh my darin’ Barney Fife / He’s a deadly crime stopper / What a copper, Barney Fife. / Then one day there came a ridin’/ Two bad men to rob a bank / But Fife was tricky, a deadeye dickie/ Now they’re locked up in the tank…
Andy Taylor: Oh my Barney, oh my Barney / Had a jail and couldn’t lock it / Had one bullet for his pistol / Had to keep it in his pocket.

 

Fred Jenkins: Now, the chief has sent me down here to observe firsthand just how you achieved this wonderful record.
Andy Taylor: Well, first-off, I think the credit ought to go where it rightfully belongs.
Barney Fife: Oh, now, Andy, you had just as much to do with it as I did.

 

Barney Fife: Yeah, I guess that’s the word that describes us best – modest. As you can see, we don’t go in for fancy technical equipment here. We’re just plain, simple men fightin’ organized crime with raw courage. Strong, determined, rugged, fearless…
Fred Jenkins: And modest.
Barney Fife: I think that’s the word that describes us best, yes.

 

Barney Fife: They’re written a folksong about us!
Andy Taylor: [reading the town paper] “The Ballad of Andy and Barney or the Gangsters’ Mistake.” If that ain’t the most ridiculous thing I ever…
Barney Fife: Oh, no, no, no. Wait a minute, now. It’s not too bad. Try it from the top. The tune is like “Frankie and Johnny.”
Andy Taylor: What foolishness will they think of next?
Barney Fife: Go ahead.
Andy Taylor: Mm. “Andy and Barney were lawmen / Bravest you ever did see / Warned every crook in the record book / To stay out of Mayber-ry / They were the law.”
Barney Fife: [joining in] “Yes, they were the law.”
Barney Fife, Andy Taylor: “… And they didn’t know fear.”
Andy Taylor: Throw that thing in the trash.
Barney Fife: Now, wait a minute, Andy. It gets better in the second verse. Listen to this: “Pretty Boy Floyd com a-ridin’ / Dillinger, too, big as life / They weren’t alone – there was Al Capone / And in back of Mack the Knife / They broke the law…”
Andy Taylor: Barney, Barney, Barney, Barney, Barney, hold it!
Barney Fife: What’s the matter?
Andy Taylor: Whoever wrote that did it for a joke.
Barney Fife: I did not!

 

Barney Fife: We defy the Mafia!

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Jinx (#2.17)” (1962)
Barney Fife: Thought I’d heard everything, but I didn’t hear everything, but I sure am hearin’ it now!

 

Barney Fife: [chanting for good luck] Come, fish, come. Come, fish, come. Sam’s at the gate with a frosted cake. Come, fish, come.

 

Barney Fife: [chanting for good luck] Fly away, buzzard. Fly away, crow. Way down south where the winds don’t blow. Rub your nose and give two winks and save us from this awful jinx.

 

Barney Fife: Boy, you insist on flyin’ right in the face of scientific fact, don’t ya?
Andy Taylor: Scientific facts?
Barney Fife: There are atmospheric rays which control bodily motions. Now, if a person containing negative or hexin’ qualities gets between you and them rays, why, he creates a static that jars any successful motion into an unsuccessful motion and jinxes ya – and THAT is a scientific fact!
Andy Taylor: And that is also the biggest crock of nothin’ I ever heard!
Barney Fife: It’s guys like you that laughed at Edison, the Wright Brothers, Buzz Fluheart.
Andy Taylor: Buzz Fluheart?
Barney Fife: The man that discovered the scientific fact I was just tellin’ ya!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Barney’s Replacement (#2.2)” (1961)
Barney Fife: A wink’s as good as a nod to a blind mule.

 

Barney Fife: I ain’t got time to stand around here and discuss trivial trivialities.

 

Emma Brand: NOT a deputy?
Barney Fife: No!
Emma Brand: Well! If you’re not a deputy, you certainly had a lot of nerve arresting me for jaywalking!

 

Barney Fife: And you better gird your loins, buster. You got a fight on your hands.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Perfect Female (#2.8)” (1961)
[Barney’s smooth ploy to get Andy over to the coffee shop has so far not worked]
Barney Fife: [anxiously] Andy, let’s go over to the coffee shop and have a cup of coffee.
Andy Taylor: Well, why?
Barney Fife: [exploding] TO MEET THELMA LOU’S COUSIN FROM ARKANSAS, THAT’S WHY!
Andy Taylor: What?
Barney Fife: THELMA LOU’S GOT THIS COUSIN IN TOWN, SHE’S FROM ARKANSAS, AND I PROMISED THELMA LOU I’D GET YOU TO THE COFFEE SHOP TO MEET HER AT 3:00 AND, IF I DON’T, THELMA LOU’S GONNA BE MAD AT ME.
Andy Taylor: Oh. Okay.
[Andy starts to head out]
Barney Fife: NOW, LOOK, ANDY, IT AIN’T OFTEN I ASK YOU TO DO ME A FAVOR, BUT THE ONE TIME I DO, YOU’D THINK YOU’D BE A LITTLE MORE COOPERATIVE. ALL I ASK IS A SIMPLE THING LIKE THAT… Where’re you goin’?
Andy Taylor: Over to the coffee shop to meet Thelma Lou’s cousin from Arkansas. You comin’?

 

Barney Fife: Aw, come on, Andy. Boy, you’re funny, you are. You ought to go on a radio and be an all-night disc jockey. At least then I could turn you off.

 

Barney Fife: Losin’ to a woman. Jiminy. It’s the end of an era.

 

Karen Moore: But, do you know something, Andy? I don’t think I really and truly know all there is to know about you. Let’s see, now – you do like music.
Andy Taylor: Well, I…
Karen Moore: Well, do you like opera, modern, classical?
Andy Taylor: I can’t… I couldn’t…
Karen Moore: And books. Do you like fiction of non-fiction. Who’s your favorite American author?
Andy Taylor: I, uh…
Karen Moore: Oh, and please just tell me one thing: do you think you could ever make a livin’ at anything besides sheriffin’? I… I hope you don’t mind my askin’ you all these questions, but you see these are things I really and truly have to know so I can evaluate you properly. You know, “pass muster.”
Barney Fife: Now just a minute! What are you tryin’ to do here?
Karen Moore: Well, it’s all very simple. When Mr. Taylor gave me the thrill and honor of okaying me as worthy of his attentions, I thought it would be awfully nice if I could award him the same thrill. I’ll tell you, Mr. Taylor, I’ll consider all of your qualities and I’ll let you know if you made the grade.

“The Andy Griffith Show: My Fair Ernest T. Bass (#4.17)” (1964)
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, I’m sorry to hear that, Ernest T. I know how important it is to ya to get a girl.
Ernest T. Bass: I’ve tried courtin’ Hog Winslow’s daughter; Hogette.
Deputy Barney Fife: Pretty name.
Ernest T. Bass: Hogette is French. French name.
[animated]
Ernest T. Bass: Well, I courted her as proper as proper can be. First off I wrote her a love note asking her to go on out with me. And then I tied it on to the prettiest rock ya ever did see. And then I give it the prettiest toss ya ever did see… right through the front window!
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, did Hogette come on out with ya?
Ernest T. Bass: Couldn’t. Caught her right there.
[points to a spot above his left ear]
Ernest T. Bass: Seven stitches.

 

Deputy Barney Fife: You lay people have got to learn to leave evidence alone. It’s going to make it very difficult now for us and the boys at the lab.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: What Lab?

 

Deputy Barney Fife: You sure got slim pickins here. Dogs, nothin but dogs.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Barney!
Deputy Barney Fife: Andy, if you flew a quail through this room, every woman in it would point.

 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: She think’s he’s from Boston.
Deputy Barney Fife: Boston?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Yeah.
Deputy Barney Fife: Andy, you did that good a job or Mrs. Wiley’s a nut.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy the Matchmaker (#1.7)” (1960)
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Now, you can’t be serious about resignin’. What in the world will you do?
Deputy Barney Fife: Oh, I-I don’t know. I could go up to the pickle factory. They always need a brine tester.

 

Deputy Barney Fife: [reading] “There once was a deputy called Fife, who carried a gun and a knife. The gun was all dusty, the knife was all rusty, ’cause he never caught a crook in his life.”

 

Deputy Barney Fife: [about the limerick] It makes out like I-I-I never wanted to catch crooks – and that just ain’t so. I’d catch ’em in a minute, but how’m I gonna catch ’em if there ain’t any, for heaven’s sake? If only somebody would just commit a crime – one good crime! If only somebody’d just… kill somebody.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: [shocked] Barney!
Deputy Barney Fife: Oh, I don’t mean anybody we know.

 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: Uh, Opie, Barney says there was a poem written on the wall of the bank and that you was standin’ along beside of it with a piece of chalk in your hand.
Opie Taylor: Yeah, but I didn’t do it, pa. Honest.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: I believe you.
Deputy Barney Fife: [angrily] Are you pittin’ your crime detectin’ judgement against mine?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, Barney, I have to, because, for one thing, Opie wouldn’t lie to me.
Deputy Barney Fife: You call that evidence?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: And for another, he ain’t learned how to write yet.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Lucky Letter (#5.19)” (1965)
Deputy Barney Fife: You work with a person long enough you get as goofy as he is!

 

Deputy Barney Fife: I am not superstitious and who says I believe in chain letters; I just don’t mess around with them that’s all.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Superstition!
Deputy Barney Fife: Now here’s where we come to a matter of terms; you call it superstition, I call it caution!

 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: Hey, Barn, does the number 13 bother you?
Deputy Barney Fife: I’m not crazy about it but it don’t bother me.

 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: What are you gonna do tonight?
Deputy Barney Fife: Nothing! Sit around in my room; not much can happen to me there.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy Saves Barney’s Morale (#1.20)” (1961)
Barney Fife: Well, he did willfully with malice aforethought throw a checkerboard full of checkers. Could’ve blinded somebody.
Andy Taylor: Well, now, seein’ as how that’s been going on between Chester and Old Jud here for around twenty years, that’s more a part OF the peace than it is disturbin’ the peace. Case dismissed, Jud. You can go on home.
Jud Fletcher: Thank ya, Andy. And thank you too, Barney.
Barney Fife: What for?
Jud Fletcher: Well, considering the kind of crime I done, for not tryin’ to get me hung.

 

Chester Jones: Barney! Barney, quick, you got to catch him!
Barney Fife: Who?
Chester Jones: The fella what just hit and run!
Barney Fife: Hit and run? Where?
Chester Jones: Out to the baseball field.

 

Barney Fife: Suck in that gut!

 

Andy Taylor: I tell you the truth, I’m surprised you didn’t get to me, too.
Barney Fife: Uh, well, if you want to get technical about it…
Andy Taylor: Huh?
Barney Fife: Well, you could be reprimanded for being out of uniform. I mean, no tie and collar open, pants unpressed, not wearin’ a revolver and gun belt, sleeves rolled up, your shoes…
[Andy holds up a hand for silence then marches himself off to his own jail cell]

“The Andy Griffith Show: A Medal for Opie (#2.19)” (1962)
[Barney talks about training Opie]
Opie Taylor: You mean you’re gonna make me one big muscle, too?
Barney Fife: Yeah.
Andy Taylor: Uh, ‘cept in your case, we’ll try to stop at the neck.
Barney Fife: [irritated] That’s very comical, Andy, only comicalness don’t win no medals.

 

Barney Fife: [chanting while skipping rope] My mother, your mother, lived across the way. Every night they have a fight and this is what they say: Ickabacka-soda cracker, ickabacka-foo. Ickabacka-sode cracker, out goes you.

 

Barney Fife: Now, boys, as Sheriff Taylor has said, I will be the official starter, and this is the official starting gun. Now, you may not run until the gun is fired. Now, when I pull the trigger, the gun will fire, and then you may run, but wait until the gun is fired. I will pull the trigger and you will then hear a shot. That means…
[Andy cuts him off so they can start the race]

 

Barney Fife: Where you goin’?
Opie Taylor: I’m leavin’. You’re a sight.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Manhunt (#1.2)” (1960)
Deputy Barney Fife: You’ll never guess what’s happened. Something big.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, what is it?
Deputy Barney Fife: Biggest thing ever happened in Mayberry. REAL big. Big. BIG big.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, now-now just simmer down, Barney. What is it?
Deputy Barney Fife: Well, I’m tryin’ to tell ya.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, so far, all I know is it’s something big.
Deputy Barney Fife: Oh, “big” ain’t the word for it.

 

Deputy Barney Fife: Andy, you can’t let Otis go.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, I have to. His sentence is up.
Deputy Barney Fife: But he’s the only prisoner we’ve got.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well?
Deputy Barney Fife: Well, what are the state police gonna think when they get here and find we got an empty jail? They gonna think this is just a hick town where nothin’ ever happens.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, now, you got to admit that-that’s about the size of it.

 

Deputy Barney Fife: He got the drop on me.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: You mean he had a gun?
Deputy Barney Fife: Ugh… well… he has NOW.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Mountain Wedding (#3.31)” (1963)
Sheriff Andy Taylor: If you ask me, this Ernest T. Bass is a strange and weird character.
Briscoe Darling: Just plain ornery’s what he is.
Deputy Barney Fife: I think he’s a nut.

 

Deputy Barney Fife: [to Ernest T. Bass] I wouldn’t marry you if you were the last man on earth!

 

Deputy Barney Fife: [the Darlings all are snoring heavily and keeping him awake] Andy?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Hm?
Deputy Barney Fife: Are you asleep?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: You kidding?

“The Andy Griffith Show: Aunt Bee the Warden (#2.23)” (1962)
Barney Fife: Great work, chief. Who are they? What’d you get ’em on? 502? 626? 308? Want me to send out an “APB”?
Andy Taylor: “All Points Bulletin”, Barney? They’re already here. They’re captured.

 

Barney Fife: Sure is good to be doin’ a capacity business, huh, Sheriff? Both these babies filled up.
Andy Taylor: Well, I’ll tell you the truth, I’d as soon see them cells empty, that way we now law and order’s bein’ observed.

 

Barney Fife: Now I have here a woodcarving set, a leather craft set, a metal craft set, and a Mr. Potato set. Now, who wants what? Now, it makes no difference to me which one you take. Well, come on, come on. Speak up. Which one do you want?
Junior Gordon: I’ll take the Mr. Potato set.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy’s Rich Girlfriend (#3.2)” (1962)
Barney Fife: It won’t work.
Andy Taylor: What won’t work?
Barney Fife: You and Peg. That’s what won’t work. Andy, I hate to have to tell you this but you’re gonna have to give her up. Forget about her. Nip it. Nip it in the bud.
Andy Taylor: What’re you talkin’ about?
Barney Fife: You want me to spell it out for ya, huh? All right, I will. Andy, she is one of the rich, and they are different.
Andy Taylor: Oh, come on.
Barney Fife: No, no, no. They are. They’re different. From the minute they’re born with that silver spoon in their hands…
Andy Taylor: Mouth.
Barney Fife: Right… life is different.

 

Barney Fife: Ya ever see a rich kid’s bicycle?
Andy Taylor: No.
Barney Fife: Solid chronium with at least six or seven red reflectors.
Andy Taylor: I’ll be dogged.
Barney Fife: Then after the bicycle age, they go off to what they call a refinishin’ school.
Andy Taylor: A finishin’ school.
Barney Fife: Right. While they’re there, they play with the same kind of kids.
Andy Taylor: Lot of reflectors.
Barney Fife: Right.

 

Barney Fife: That poor, blind fool. He don’t know it but he’s headed right for heartbreak alley.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Cow Thief (#3.5)” (1962)
William Upchurch: Sheriff tells me you decided not to make a moulage.
Barney Fife: [obviously unfamiliar with the word] A moulage? Y-y… yeah, that’s right. We decided not to make a moulage, he-he. Oh, we told a few people, but we decided it didn’t make sense upsettin’ folks runnin’ around blabbin’, makin’ a big moulage out of it.
Andy Taylor: Uh, Barney, he means a plaster cast of the prints.
Barney Fife: Th-THAT kind of moulage.

 

Barney Fife: [trying to sound experienced while mixing ingredients] I think that can use a touch more plaster. I always like to make my moulages just a bit on the solid side.
Andy Taylor: [not buying it] I like to use a little egg white in mine. Makes ’em moister and fluffier.

 

Barney Fife: I was almost out to the car and… Well, I got to rememberin’ another time, a few years back, when another mayor of our town accused you of havin’ a harebrained idea. Remember that? That was when you had the idea of making me your deputy.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy the Marriage Counselor (#1.18)” (1961)
[Andy and Barney have just been called to calm the Boones]
Barney Fife: Now, Jennie, put that cup down! Put it down RIGHT NOW!

 

Barney Fife: I see what you did wrong now.
Andy Taylor: Huh?
Barney Fife: You was holdin’ the knife in the wrong hand.
Andy Taylor: Oh, I’m sorry. I’ll try to be more considerate next time I attack you.

 

Barney Fife: Throw the book at ’em.
Andy Taylor: Wouldn’t do any good. Jennie’d just pick it up and throw it back at Fred.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Barney and the Choir (#2.20)” (1962)
Barney Fife: Yeah, it’s tough all right. As my old voice teacher used to say, “A choir without its tenor is like a star without its glimmer.” You know who used to say that? My old voice teacher. That’s the teacher I had when I studied voice.

 

Barney Fife: See, you’ve got a uvula, they’ve got a uvula, I got a uvula, all God’s children got a uvula!
Andy Taylor: Hallelujah.

 

Andy Taylor: Hold it! Barney, you’re supposed to be talking.
Barney Fife: Oh, it’s no use, Andy. Can you tell a bird to talk? Can you tell a bird to just go chirp, chirp, chirp? No, Andy, I’m like a bird. I was born to sing.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Return of Malcolm Merriweather (#4.28)” (1964)
Barney Fife: There’s nothing worse than a wino on a crying jag.

 

Barney Fife: [Barney sees that Malcolm is obviously drunk] Andy… He’s gassed!

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Pickle Story (#2.11)” (1961)
Barney Fife: I don’t know how I can face the future when I know there’s eight quarts of these pickles in it.

 

Barney Fife: You mean you actually WANT her to make another batch of them kerosene cucumbers?

“The Andy Griffith Show: Mayberry on Record (#1.19)” (1961)
Barney Fife: Come on, everybody, let’s all take a bite out of Barney Fife!

 

Andy Taylor: Now, they’re all legitimate government deductions. Besides, you know what they say, “Can’t take it with you.”
Barney Fife: Take it WITH me? They keep nibblin’ at me like this, I’ll be lucky if I get to go myself.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Sermon for Today (#4.4)” (1963)
Barney Fife: Yeah, we really packed it away.
Andy Taylor: Yeah, boy.
Barney Fife: Fortunately, none of mine goes to fat. All goes to muscle.
Andy Taylor: Mmm.
Barney Fife: It’s a mark of us Fifes. Everything we eat goes to muscle.
[pats stomach]
Barney Fife: See there?

 

Aunt Bee Taylor: Oh, Dr. Breen, your sermon has such a wonderful lesson for us.
Andy Taylor: Yes, sir, you really hit the nail right on the head there.
Barney Fife: Yes, sir, that’s one subject you just can’t talk enough about… SIN.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Mr. McBeevee (#3.1)” (1962)
Opie Taylor: I told Mr. McBeevee I’d be right back.
Andy Taylor: Who?
Opie Taylor: Mr. McBeevee. You don’t know him. He’s new around here. I just met him this mornin’.
Andy Taylor: Oh.
Barney Fife: Oh, a newcomer in town, eh? Where’s he live at?
Opie Taylor: I met him in the woods.
Barney Fife: What’s he doin’ in the woods?
Opie Taylor: Well, mostly he walks around up in the treetops.
Barney Fife: He walks in the tree…
Barney Fife: [getting wise] Mm-hm. I supposed he’s invisible, too.
Opie Taylor: No. Mr. McBeevee’s easy to see, especially his hat. He wears a great, big, shiny silver hat.

 

Opie Taylor: [in describing Mr. McBeevee] The only thing is, when he walks he sort of jingles.
Barney Fife: He jingles?
Opie Taylor: Just like he had rings on his fingers and bells on his toes.
Barney Fife: [clearing throat] Well, course, uh, he don’t REALLY have rings on his fingers and bells on his toes, now does he, Ope?
Opie Taylor: No. Just sounds that way.
Barney Fife: [relieved] That’s right.
Opie Taylor: The jinglin’ is really from all the things hangin’ on his belt.
Barney Fife: What things?
Opie Taylor: His hands. His twelve extra hands.
Barney Fife: He has twelve… extra hands and they… jingle.
Opie Taylor: And he can make smoke come out of his ears.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Shoplifters (#4.21)” (1964)
Deputy Barney Fife: Well, play the game! Play the game! I hate it when you get obtuse!

 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: He’s one of our most respected citizens, one of our best church-goin’ members. He knows every hymn in the book.
Deputy Barney Fife: Aw, that’s just a front! You watch him sometime when we’re singin’ “Leaning On The Everlasting Arms.” He don’t even know the words! He just moves his lips!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Up in Barney’s Room (#4.10)” (1963)
Barney Fife: Who ever heard of a room you couldn’t cook in? Six dollars a week, and what do I get? Heartaches, nothin’ but heartaches!

 

Barney Fife: I don’t like it, I just don’t like it!
Andy Taylor: Don’t like what?
Barney Fife: Her marrying that stranger.
Andy Taylor: He’s no stranger to her…
Barney Fife: [Barney looking frustrated and angry] All right, let em get married… I just hope it ends in a quickie Mexican divorce
Andy Taylor: BARNEY!

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Guitar Player (#1.3)” (1960)
[Shortly after Sheriff Taylor arrests Jim Lindsey, they jam together on guitars in the jailhouse]
Sheriff Andy Taylor: [singing solo as they play] Ridin’ on that new river train. Ridin’ on that new river train. Same old train that brought me here gonna take me back again.
[Andy and Jim play through an instrumental passage]
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Darlin’, you can’t love one. Darlin’, you can’t love one. Can’t love one and have any fun. Oh, darlin’, you can’t love one.
[Deputy Barney Fife enters the jailhouse during a second instrumental passage]
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Sing, Barney.
Sheriff Andy Taylor, Deputy Barney Fife: [together, as Jim and Andy continue to play] Ridin’ on that new river train. Ridin on that new river train. Same old train that brought me here gonna take me home again.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: One more.
Sheriff Andy Taylor, Deputy Barney Fife: [Andy and Barney sing together as song concludes with Andy and Jim on their guitars] Ridin’ on that new river train. Ridin’ on that new river train. Same old train that brought me here gonna take me back again.

 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: [Bobby Fleet and his band members, arrested off screen, now stand at Andy’s desk] Guilty as charged. That’ll be twenty dollars or 24 hours in jail.
Bobby Fleet: [quickly spoken, in frustration] Twenty fish for a crummy parking rap?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, we try to keep it low for the first offense.
Bobby Fleet: Yeah, and how much of the twenty do you stick in your own kick?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Ohh, I wished you hadn’t a said that. I mean, I don’t mind an insult personally but, why, you’ve offended the dignity of my robes. Now, let’s see… what is our price for robe dignity offendin’? Why, that’s $50.
Bobby Fleet: [quickly spoken, in frustration] $50?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Yeah, plus the twenty, that’s seventy altogether.
Bobby Fleet: Aw, come on now! Now, look Sheriff, there’s no reason to get hot under the collar over this. I mean, uh, you’ve got your job to do, and I’ve got mine. Now, uhh… Oh, that reminds me. We’re gonna be playin’ at the capitol over the weekend. Now, how would you and your fine deputy here like to come and see us, huh? I’ll see that you have a big time. Oh, you’ll be my guests, of course.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Ohhh. Now, you have REALLY done it.
Bobby Fleet: [spoken very quickly, in exasperation] What, what, what, what, what?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, you just tried to bribe me is all. That’s the worst thing anybody can do. I hate to tell you what the fine is on that.
Bobby Fleet: Never mind. I don’t care what the fine is. I’m not gonna pay it.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Oh, you mean you’ll take the 24 hours?
Bobby Fleet: That’s just what I mean. No hick Sheriff is gonna bleed me. We’ll all stay overnight.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, that’s the way it’ll be then.
[Andy bangs his gavel, closing the case]
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Deputy, lock up the prisoners.
Deputy Barney Fife: Glad to! All right, let’s move it along! Come on, on the double there! Come on, let’s look sharp! Look sharp! Come on, get in there. And suck in that gut!

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Horse Trader (#1.14)” (1961)
Andy Taylor: You wanna buy this cannon?
Barney Fife: No!
Andy Taylor: Well, stop makin’ faces!

 

Andy Taylor: You wanna buy this cannon?
Barney Fife: No!
Andy Taylor: Well, shut up!

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Case of the Punch in the Nose (#5.25)” (1965)
Charles Foley: [Recounting the incident of 20 years ago] One word led to another, and he punched me, right in the nose!
[giggles]
Deputy Barney Fife: What’s so funny?
Charles Foley: Can you imagine Floyd punching anybody? It was more like a *boop*!

 

Deputy Barney Fife: Neatness counts. Make order the order of the day.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Barney on the Rebound (#2.5)” (1961)
Andy Taylor: Thelma Lou got a mad on at you, has she?
Barney Fife: Andy, what is it with women. They got some kind of a rule they can’t be happy unless they’re causin’ trouble?

 

Gladys ‘Melissa’ Stevens: [cuddling up against Barney] Wouldn’t you like to stay like this forever?
Barney Fife: [uncomfortably] Well…
Gladys ‘Melissa’ Stevens: Well, wouldn’t you?
Barney Fife: Yeah, I guess.
Gladys ‘Melissa’ Stevens: Barney, do you mean it? Daddy! Daddy, come quick! Wait’ll ya hear!
Barney Fife: What? What? Hear what?
George Stevens: What is it? What is it? What happened?
Gladys ‘Melissa’ Stevens: Daddy, guess what? Barney has just proposed to me.
George Stevens: He did?
Gladys ‘Melissa’ Stevens: He did.
Barney Fife: I did?

“The Andy Griffith Show: High Noon in Mayberry (#3.17)” (1963)
Sheriff Andy Taylor: [Andy and Barney are discussing the “threatening” letter from the recently released ex-con whom Andy shot in the leg during a filling station hold up when the phone rings] Hello, sheriff’s office… Oh, yes Ms. Peterson, aww… Well I’ll take care of it right away… Yes, Ma’am. Bye.
[Hangs up the phone]
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Ms. Peterson ‘s Fluffy’s on the roof again.
Deputy Barney Fife: This is a time for pussycats with a killer on the loose?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, Fluffy’s got kittens and you know how you’d feel seeing your mother on the roof.
Deputy Barney Fife: [Follows Andy to the door as he’s leaving, and takes his gun from the holster and tries to get Andy to take it] Andy… take this, put it under your shirt.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: I won’t need it, Barn. Fluffy and I’ve been friends for years.

 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: [Billy Ray is delivering mail to the courthouse] I’ll take it Billy Ray.
Billy Ray, the Postman: Oh no you don’t. The mail must go through.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: But I’m standing right here. Hand it to me Billy Ray.
Billy Ray, the Postman: You’re not an authorized receptacle.
Deputy Barney Fife: But he’s an official of this county.
Billy Ray, the Postman: Means nothin’ to me. I’m a Fed.
Deputy Barney Fife: Wait until you park that mail truck of yours in an illegal spot some time.
Billy Ray, the Postman: As long as I’m carryin’ registered mail, I got the right of way over ambulance, police cars, fire engines, and heavier-than-air craft.
Deputy Barney Fife: Put a mail sack on some people, goes right to their Heads!

“The Andy Griffith Show: The County Nurse (#2.24)” (1962)
Barney Fife: That little kissy on the jaw, that, uh, felt kinda good, didn’t it?
Andy Taylor: It felt better than a mule’s nose, yes.

 

Barney Fife: You know, it’s a good thing she ain’t campaignin’ for folks to get their eyes examined.
Andy Taylor: How’s that?
Barney Fife: One kiss on your jaw and we’d all be wearin’ glasses.
Andy Taylor: Oh, now, come on, Barney. I mean…
Barney Fife: If she ever kissed you on the mouth, we’d all have to have our appendix taken out.
Andy Taylor: You’re a nut.
Barney Fife: Well, you’re a dear.

“The Andy Griffith Show: A Date for Gomer (#4.9)” (1963)
Barney Fife: A man spends money gettin’ his suit spotted and pressed takes two hours polishing his hat, and for what? Heartaches!

 

Barney Fife: We gotta get some guy that’s not been around too much, you know, really naive, some guy with not too much upstairs, in other words, a real dope.
Gomer Pyle: [Gomer enters] Hey Andy! Hey Barney!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Stranger in Town (#1.12)” (1960)
Barney Fife: Next time I want a haircut, I’m gonna stick my head in a pencil sharpener.
Floyd the Barber: Yes, sir, and it’ll fit, too.

 

Barney Fife: And I still think he’s some kind of a spy.
Andy Taylor: Oh, you do?
Barney Fife: Yes, I do.
Andy Taylor: And you figure somebody here in town is his contact, and maybe between ’em they’re tryin’ to figure out some of our secrets, like h-how we make possum pie, or how me make turnip jam… Laaa-aaaw! You DON’T reckin’ he’s here snoopin’ around tryin’ to find out how we make fried chicken and johnnycake, do you?

“The Andy Griffith Show: Barney’s Sidecar (#4.16)” (1964)
Barney Fife: [Walks in wearing helmet, leather gloves, and a leather jacket] Mounted patrol checking in.
Andy Taylor: How are you Baron Von Richthofen?

 

Barney Fife: If you ride with your mouth open in the wind and put your tongue against the roof of your mouth, its impossible to pronounce a word that begins with the letter ‘s’.
Andy Taylor: You didn’t let anyone see you riding with your mouth open?

“The Andy Griffith Show: Citizen’s Arrest (#4.11)” (1963)
Deputy Barney Fife: Gomer, I have to uphold the law, no matter what! It’s only what any responsible person should do. Why, even if I weren’t a policeman, I would still arrest you for making a illegal U-turn… any person can do that, you know… it’s called a citizen’s arrest.
Gomer Pyle: [seeing Barney make a U-turn with his squad car as he drives away] Hey! HEEEYYYY – – BARNEY! You made an illegal u-turn YOURSELF! You’re breakin’ the law, and so I, as a responsible person, need to arrest you! Citizen’s arrest! Citizen’s arrest!

 

Deputy Barney Fife: Boy that Mrs. Devero sure is ugly, ain’t she?
Andy Taylor: Barney, she can’t help it.
Deputy Barney Fife: She’s just ugly as homemade soap.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The New Housekeeper (#1.1)” (1960)
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Anybody here know why these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace. I now pronounce you man…
Opie Taylor: I know why they shouldn’t be married.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Opie, what’re you tryin’ to do?
Opie Taylor: I’m speakin’ now so’s I won’t have to forever hold my peace.
Deputy Barney Fife: You’re not supposed to speak.
Opie Taylor: Then why did he ask?

 

Deputy Barney Fife: Aw, shucks, Andy. I want to do good on this job. Even if it’s just deliverin’ messages, I wanna do it right.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, I know you do, and-and-and I admire your attitude.
Deputy Barney Fife: You see, Andy, I want the folks in this town to realize that you picked me to be your deputy because you, well, you looked over all the candidates for the job, and-and you judged their qualifications and their character and their ability, and you come to the fair, the just, and the honest conclusion that I was the best-suited for the job. An… and I wanna thank you, Cousin Andy.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: You’re welcome, Cousin Barney.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Farmer Takes a Wife (#2.13)” (1962)
Barney Fife: I’m disappointed in you, Andy. I am REALLY disappoint… I have… I can’t remember when I have been THIS disappointed in you.
Andy Taylor: What are you disappointed in me for?
Barney Fife: Well, why didn’t you stop me?
Andy Taylor: I couldn’t stop ya.
Barney Fife: That’s right, that’s right. Pass the buck.
Andy Taylor: Barney, I’m not passin’ the buck. I’m just remindin’ you of the facts, and the facts are: Jeff come to town, said he’s lookin’ for a bride, you said you’d help him, and the way you helped you took him over to Thelma Lou’s, and that’s how it all happened.
Barney Fife: Oh, why hash over ancient history?

 

Barney Fife: Nip it! Nip it in the bud!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Deputy Otis (#2.31)” (1962)
[Otis receives a letter at the courthouse]
Otis Campbell: Would you mind readin’ it fer me, Andy? I ain’t got my glasses.
Barney Fife: Can’t you read without ’em?
Otis Campbell: Only labels.

 

Barney Fife: Well, what kind of a job can you give to Otis? Well, he’s irresponsible, he’s careless, he’s unreliable.
Andy Taylor: I’ll make him a deputy.
“The Simpsons: The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson (#9.1)” (1997)
Lenny: Hey, let’s go to the girls college!
Carl: No! Playboy Mansion, Playboy Mansion!
Homer Simpson: It’s my car, and I say we’re going to the Lost City of Gold!
Barney Gumble: [angry] Oh, that’s just drunk talk!
[dreamy]
Barney Gumble: Sweet, beautiful drunk talk…

 

Homer: [after Barney has been missing for two months] Barney, where have you been?
Barney: All I can remember about the last two months, is giving a guest lecture at Villanova. Or maybe it was a street corner.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Bookie Barber (#2.28)” (1962)
Barney Fife: [concerned about Floyd’s cut of his sideburns] Andy.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Mm.
Barney Fife: Look at this.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Look at what?
Barney Fife: Can’t ya see? They ain’t even.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, I’ll be dogged, you’re right.
Barney Fife: Doggone, I knew it. I told him.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: One ear IS longer than the other.
Barney Fife: You’re almost as funny as Floyd, you know that? Why don’t you two team up and call yourselves Frick and Frack!

 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: Them fellas goin’ into the barbershop there.
Barney Fife: What about ’em?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Ain’t they the same three fellas we saw goin’ in there yesterday about this time?
Barney Fife: Yeah, now that you mention it, they do look familiar.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Yeah. Don’t that seem a little strange to you, customer goin’ back to the barbershop the very next day?
Barney Fife: No.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: No?
Barney Fife: No. Didn’t you ever hear of a person with a compelsion complex.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: A what?
Barney Fife: Compelsion complex, you know, like when folks gotta be a washin’ their hands all day long – that’s a hand-washin’ compelsion. Well, what you’re lookin’ at there, that’s a case of hair-cuttin’ compelsion.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: All three of ’em?
Barney Fife: Well, all three of ’em’s got the compelsion. Listen, you find compelsion nuts all over.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Sheriff Barney (#2.12)” (1961)
Barney Fife: Why don’t we go up to the hospital some night and take the bolts off of the wheelchairs? That’d be funny, too.

 

Barney Fife: This is your subconscious. Come in, please.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Runaway Kid (#1.6)” (1960)
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Dadburnit, I’m a sheriff and I got my duty to do.
Deputy Barney Fife: Yeah. Oh… oh… where’re you goin’?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Home to get permission from my son to do it.

 

Deputy Barney Fife: That’s twice in one day you’ve run afoul of the law! You keep this up and I’m gonna have to draw YOUR face NEXT!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Aunt Bee’s Medicine Man (#3.24)” (1963)
Barney Fife: Where there’s smoke, there’s firewater!

 

Barney Fife: Andy, I hate to say this, but…
Andy Taylor: You don’t have to.
Barney Fife: If it was anybody else, I’d say she was tiddly!
Andy Taylor: If it was anybody else, you’d be right. But she won’t even let a fruitcake in the house, on account of a brother she had.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Opie’s Hobo Friend (#2.6)” (1961)
Barney Fife: Oh, Andy, everything’s breakin’ loose. First, Mrs. Tillman has an apple pie stolen from her window. Now, Jess Crawford just reported a chicken thief. It’s a regular reign of terror!

 

Barney Fife: Oh, my gosh, there goes a whole cow!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Jailbreak (#2.18)” (1962)
Barney Fife: [answering the phone] Sheriff’s office, Fife here.
Art Crowley, the Grocer: This is Art over at the grocery store. Listen, I finally got the dog that’s been barkin’ every morning and wakin’ up the whole neighborhood.
Barney Fife: [bending his responses to impress a visiting state policeman within earshot] Oh, you have, huh? Are you sure he’s the one we’re after?
Art Crowley, the Grocer: Sure I’m sure. It’s Sam, the big brute that belongs to Floyd.
Barney Fife: The big brute, huh? Well, we don’t need the sheriff for this. I’ll take him single-handed.
Art Crowley, the Grocer: And tell Floyd to keep him tied up!
Barney Fife: Right. It’ll be the rope for him. I’ll be right over.

“The Andy Griffith Show: A Black Day for Mayberry (#4.7)” (1963)
Opie Taylor: Who are they? Friends of Pa’s?
Deputy Barney Fife: No, they’re just waiting.
Opie Taylor: What for?
Deputy Barney Fife: Don’t ask me what for, I just run the waiting room, that’s all.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Barney’s First Car (#3.27)” (1963)
Barney Fife: The last big buy I made was my mom’s and dad’s anniversary present.
Andy Taylor: What’d ya get ’em?
Barney Fife: Septic tank.
Andy Taylor: For their anniversary?
Barney Fife: Yeah. Oh, they’re really hard to buy for. Besides, it was something they could use. They were really thrilled. Two tons of concrete, all steel reinforced.
Andy Taylor: You’re a fine son, Barn.
Barney Fife: I try.
“The Simpsons: Homer’s Phobia (#8.15)” (1997)
[hiding underneath a trough]
Barney: Is it okay to come out now, Mr. Gay Man, sir?

 

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Loaded Goat (#3.18)” (1963)
Barney Fife: Andy, are you havin’ a spell?
“The Simpsons: Simpson Tide (#9.19)” (1998)
Homer Simpson: I’ve joined the Naval Reserve.
Barney: I’m not going to let anything happen to my best friend. I’m joining too.
Moe: I’m not going to let anything happen to my two best customers, I’m joining, too.
Apu: Even though my religion strictly forbids military service, what the hey.
“The Simpsons: Lisa’s Sax (#9.3)” (1997)
Homer Simpson: Oh, my father gave me beer as a child.’Til wrapped my little red wagon around a tree.
Barney Gumble: [Flashback to Homer and Barney as boys] Let’s never drink again.
Homer Simpson: [Flashback to the present, Homer has a Duff beer in his hand] And we never did.
[Drinks it]

 

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Education of Ernest T. Bass (#5.4)” (1964)
Sheriff Andy Taylor: I just don’t know what to do. I can’t put him in jail, he keeps breakin’ out. I can’t make him understand he’s got to leave Helen alone. I don’t know what to do with him.
Deputy Barney Fife: Well, you won’t listen to me – you won’t listen to your old dad. All I have to do is give him a couple of karate chops, flip him into a corner, and he’d get up and head back for the mountains, never to be seen again.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: He’d kill you.
[Barney looking annoyed]
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, the easiest way is to satisfy him – he wants an education, we’ll give him an education. We’ll fix him up with a diploma and everything.
Deputy Barney Fife: I still say, five minutes behind the barn!
Helen Crump: He’d kill you.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy on Trial (#2.29)” (1962)
Deputy Barney Fife: [Testifying at hearing] … Why Andy’s the best friend I got in the whole world. And as far as I’m concerned, he’s the best Sheriff too. All them things I said; for example, his using the squad car for personal reasons. Sure, he was delivering groceries to Emma Watson because she was too sick to get down to the market. And that’s just one example of the thing’s Andy’s done for the folks in this town. I could give you a lot more. You gotta understand, this is a small town. The Sheriff is more than just a Sheriff. He’s a friend. And the people in this town, they ain’t got a better friend than Andy Taylor. As far as Andy knowing his job… I’d just like for you to take a look in the record book Mr. Jackson. You know there ain’t been a major crime committed in this town thanks to Sheriff Taylor? The only ruckus you’d ever have in Mayberry is if you tried to remove him from office. Then you’d have a riot. You asked me if Andy runs a taught ship Mr. Milton. Well, no he don’t. But that’s because of something that he’s been trying to teach me every since I started working for him. And that is, when you’re a law man and you’re dealing with people, you do a whole lot better if you go not so much by the book, but by the heart. I guess maybe that’s kinda hard for some of you to understand… I don’t know… its all I got to say.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Bank Job (#3.13)” (1962)
Sheriff Andy Taylor: [Andy and Barney walking out of the bank with Barney disgusted at how apathetic everyone, including Asa, the security guard, is toward the bank’s security; and Andy trying to calm Barney down] Now simmer down, Barn.
Deputy Barney Fife: Four years Asa’s been walkin’ around without any screws in his gun. Where’s the hardware store? Right down the street a whip and a whisker away. Boy, oh boy.
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Alright, I’ll go get screws and put ’em in Asa’s gun. What kind of gun has Asa got?
Deputy Barney Fife: Oh, one of those old Teddy Roosevelt Horse Pistols

“The Andy Griffith Show: The New Doctor (#1.24)” (1961)
Barney Fife: Listen to that – two young people lost in a world of pills.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Dogs, Dogs, Dogs (#3.30)” (1963)
[Reassuring Opie after releasing a group of dogs to the countryside as a thunderstorm approaches]
Barney Fife: A dog can’t get struck by lightning. You know why? Because he’s, he’s too close to the ground. See, lightning strikes tall things. Now, now if they was giraffes out there in that field, well then we’d be in trouble.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Ellie for Council (#1.10)” (1960)
Sam Lindsey: There he is. There’s the weak-kneed, chicken-livered, yella-streak turncoat.
Barney Fife: Now look, Sam. You got something to say, say it.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Man in the Middle (#5.7)” (1964)
Barney Fife: I’m sick of the whole thing, too. You try to bring two people together and what do you get? Heartaches!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Aunt Bee the Crusader (#4.15)” (1964)
Andy Taylor: I know what he’s doing, too. He ain’t fooling me. I know what he’s doing. He’s giving presents to Aunt Bee and Opie and everybody, hoping they’ll work on me.
Barney Fife: He’s doing that?
Andy Taylor: Yeah.
Andy Taylor: He give Opie a Rooster, Aunt Bee a mustache cup.
Barney Fife: We could get him on a 204.
Andy Taylor: What’s that?
Barney Fife: Bribery,collusion, tampering with, and/or intimidation of material witnesses.
Andy Taylor: That’s a 204?
Barney Fife: Kind of a catchall.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Goodbye Sheriff Taylor (#5.10)” (1964)
Deputy Barney Fife: On this job there’s only two kinds of cops: the quick and the dead!

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy Forecloses (#1.28)” (1961)
Andy Taylor: You know, I just can’t believe that anybody could be as mean as Ben Weaver’s makin’ out.
Barney Fife: He sure got me convinced.
Andy Taylor: [an idea] Well, maybe he just don’t see how mean he really is.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Ernest T. Bass Joins the Army (#4.3)” (1963)
[Andy, Barney and the recruiting sergeant watch as Ernest T. Bass incur his wrath on Mayberry for not getting into the Army]
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Look at him go. He’s a strange one.
Recruiting Sergeant: He’s a wild one.
Deputy Barney Fife: He’s a nut.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Clubmen (#2.10)” (1961)
Barney Fife: Boy, you’re a clown, you are. Why don’t cha put a red light onto your nose and go in the circus?

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Big House (#3.32)” (1963)
[shouting to two prisoners]
Barney Fife: Now here at “The Rock” we have two basic rules. Memorize them so that you can say them in your sleep. The first rule is… Obey all rules. Secondly, do not write on the walls, as it takes a lot of work to erase writing off of walls.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy and the Gentleman Crook (#1.21)” (1961)
[Barney accidentally fires off his gun]
Andy Taylor: Barney, you promised me when I gave you that bullet you’d keep it in your shirt pocket. Now, why’d you take it out?
Barney Fife: Oh, I’m sorry, Andy. I… Doggone it, that bullet was turnin’ green in my pocket. I thought it’d keep better in the gun.
Andy Taylor: Barney…
Barney Fife: And besides, I’ve already lost two bullets in the laundry.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Aunt Bee’s Invisible Beau (#5.27)” (1965)
Deputy Barney Fife: He buttered her up and she egged him on!

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Rumor (#4.29)” (1964)
Deputy Barney Fife: [Barney trying to keep Andy from going home to dress for dinner] Well, it’s a whim. Are you going to question a whim? You question a whim and you take the fun right out of it!
Sheriff Andy Taylor: Well, would it kill the whim if I just take a shower and put on some clean socks and underwear?
Deputy Barney Fife: Sure it will! It’s not a whim anymore if you put on clean underwear!
Sheriff Andy Taylor: I don’t understand it. But I guess a fellow shouldn’t question when he’s getting a free supper.
Deputy Barney Fife: That’s right! Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Can you let me have $5?

“The Andy Griffith Show: One-Punch Opie (#3.14)” (1962)
Barney Fife: Yeah, well, today’s eight-year-olds are tomorrow’s teenagers. I say this calls for action and now. Nip it in the bud. First sign of youngsters goin’ wrong, you got to nip it in the bud.
Andy Taylor: I’m gonna have a talk with ’em. Now, what more do you want me to do?
Barney Fife: Well, just don’t mollycoddle them.
Andy Taylor: I won’t.
Barney Fife: Nip it. You go read any book you want on the subject of child discipline and you’ll find that every one of them is in favor of bud-nippin’.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Lawman Barney (#3.7)” (1962)
Deputy Barney Fife: [after the two farmers crowd him when he asks them to move their vegetable stand outside of the town limits] You’re both a lot bigger than I am, but this badge represents a lot of people. They’re a lot bigger than either one of you. Now, are you gonna get movin’?

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Haunted House (#4.2)” (1963)
Barney Fife: All I’m saying is that there are some things beyond the ken of mortal man that shouldn’t be tampered with. We don’t know everything, Andy. There’s plenty goin’ on right now in the Twilight Zone that we don’t know anything about and I think we oughta stay clear.

“The Andy Griffith Show: The Great Filling Station Robbery (#3.22)” (1963)
Deputy Barney Fife: Gentlemen, I give you science in action, proof positive! The camera does not lie – THERE is your criminal!
[Slams picture from security camera on desk, only to discover it’s a picture he accidentally shot of himself setting up the device]
Deputy Barney Fife: [Aghast] It’s ME!
Gomer Pyle: Hey, you take a purty good picture, Barn! Me, I never do.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Back to Nature (#4.31)” (1964)
Barney Fife: You see a wild bird just flies in there to get them berries and then it knocks against that stick there and then this, this snare, you see, just falls down on it and you got it.
Gomer Pyle: Well, I guess it’s gonna be tough eatin’, though. A bird strong enough to move them rocks and knock that stick over’s bound to be on the muscular side.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Alcohol and Old Lace (#1.17)” (1961)
Barney Fife: [Barney and Andy have found Ben’s still] Lets go in shootin.
Andy Taylor: Now easy Barney. That’s ol’ Ben, he’s a friend of ours. There ain’t no call to go shootin at ol’ Ben. We’ll just move in and take him easy like. Come on.
[yells to Ben]
Andy Taylor: Howdy Ben. I say, Ben you got company.
[Ben shoots at them]
Barney Fife: Don’t go shootin at ol’ Ben, huh. Well ain’t that better than him shootin at ol’ us?

“The Andy Griffith Show: Barney Mends a Broken Heart (#3.6)” (1962)
Barney Fife: You’ll never be lonely as long as I’m around.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Irresistible Andy (#1.5)” (1960)
Ellie Walker: How dare you think I’d wanna marry you? Who do you think you are? Just because I accepted what I thought was a friendly, neighborly invitation… And for your information, Mr. Sheriff, I’ve given dozens of children free ice cream cones – even if they weren’t the children of such gorgeous, charming, desirable catches as yourself! Well, let me tell you something, you big, brave hero – I wouldn’t go to the dance with you if you were the last man on Earth, let alone marry you! Nor do I need your generous help in getting an escort. And just to prove it to you, I’m going to go with the first single, unattached man who comes through that door!
Deputy Barney Fife: [entering] Hi.
Ellie Walker: YOU!
Deputy Barney Fife: Me?
Ellie Walker: Yes. Are you taking anyone to the church dance Saturday?
Deputy Barney Fife: No.
Ellie Walker: In that case, I accept your invitation! Thank You!
[Ellie storms off]
Deputy Barney Fife: [to Andy] I just come in here for some foot powder.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Three’s a Crowd (#2.27)” (1962)
Andy Taylor: They’s somp’in’ I wanna talk to you about.
Barney Fife: Yeah?
Andy Taylor: You know, for about a week now, we been spendin’ a lot of time together, right?
Barney Fife: Yeah.
Andy Taylor: I mean, it’s been Mary and me and you and Thelma Lou or… Mary and me and you, and, uh, well, I was thinkin’…
Barney Fife: Yeah?
Andy Taylor: Don’t you think we ought to spend some time alone? D’you, uh… Do you understand?
Barney Fife: Well, sure, I understand, Andy. Of course.
Barney Fife: [picks up telephone] Sarah, uh, get me 2-4-7.
Barney Fife: [to Andy] You should have mentioned this sooner.
Barney Fife: [on phone] Uh, Thelma Lou? Barn. H’yeah. Uh, listen, we can’t make it over to Mary’s tonight. Uh, Andy and I wanna spend some time alone.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Andy and the Woman Speeder (#2.3)” (1961)
Barney Fife: You know, Andy, there’s one thing you got to say about this case. It was a gas.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Barney Gets His Man (#1.30)” (1961)
Andy Taylor: Well, what’s the matter, Barney?
Barney Fife: I swallowed my gum.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Man in a Hurry (#3.16)” (1963)
Barney Fife: You know what I think I’m gonna do?
Sheriff Andy Taylor: What?
Barney Fife: I’m gonna go home, have me a little nap, then go over to Thelma Lou’s and watch a little TV… Yeah, I believe that’s what I’ll do. Go home, have a nap, then over to Thelma Lou’s for TV… Yep, that’s the plan, go home, little nap…
Malcolm Tucker: For the love of Mike, do it! Do it! JUST DO IT!
Barney Fife: What’s the hurry?

“The Andy Griffith Show: Prisoner of Love (#4.18)” (1964)
The Prisoner: I don’t know much about these things. What should I call you? Sergeant? Lieutenant?
Deputy Barney Fife: No. No, nothing like that. No, y-you can just uh,
[clears throat]
Deputy Barney Fife: call me by my name
The Prisoner: How nice. And What is your name?
Deputy Barney Fife: It’s… uh… it’s uh… it’s Fife!… Bernard P. Fife l… Well, Bernard Fife… Deputy Fife… B-Barney Fife! That’s it. Barney Fife’s my name.

“The Andy Griffith Show: Rafe Hollister Sings (#3.20)” (1963)
Andy Taylor: [seeing how many musical terms Barney actually knows] What would you do if they asked you to sing a capella?
Barney Fife: Well, I’d DO it!
[to the tune of “La Cucaracha”]
Barney Fife: A capella, a capella…

“The Andy Griffith Show The Lucky Letter (#5 19)” (1965) Deputy Barney Fife You work with a person long enough you get as goofy as he is! Deputy Barney Fife I am not superstitious and who says I believe in chain letters; I just don’t mess around with them that’s all
Barney Fife (Character) – Quotes – IMDb
www imdb com character ch0215486 quotes

Barney Fife (Character) – Quotes – IMDb
www imdb com character ch0215486 quotes
“The Andy Griffith Show The Lucky Letter (#5 19)” (1965) Deputy Barney Fife You work with a person long enough you get as goofy as he is! Deputy Barney Fife I am not superstitious and who says I believe in chain letters; I just don’t mess around with them that’s all

The Andy Griffith Show (TV Series 1960–1968) – Quotes – IMDb
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Barney Fife Andy, I’ve this one dead to rights! Otis was drunk I even gave him a test I drew a line on the sidewalk and told him to walk it You know what he
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Actors Andy Griffith (Sheriff Andy Taylor), right Don Knotts (Deputy Barney Fife), in a scene from the “The Andy Griffith Show” on Jan
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As well, the story follows Andy’s deputy, Barney Fife, his aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and his son, Opie The series was well received and won numerous
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[hide] 1 Unidentified episodes 1 1 Andy; 1 2 Barney Fife; 1 3 Gomer Goober; 1 4 Other Unsorted 2 Dialogue; 3 More Dialogue; 4 Cast; 5 External links
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Jan 17, 2016 – It’s from A Date for Gomer (season 4, episode 9) that aired in 1963, where Barney tries to give Gomer some advice about dating Barney What
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If you want to see a funny video and the Preamble of the Constitution this is the right spot My teacher played this
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Knotts played his character seamlessly and was rewarded with five Emmy Awards for his portrayal of Deputy Barney Fife Knotts left the show after five seasons
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Welcome to Miss Peggy’s Post – a – Quote Archive Page Barney Bee Taylor Age Aunt Bee You say another word Barney Fife and you’ll regret it!!
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Don Knotts created Deputy Barney Fife as a hyper-kinetic but comically inept counterpart to Barney fife-high-school324b Barney’s Famous Quotes
First Episode‎ ‎The New Housekeeper
Full Name‎ ‎Bernard P Milton Oliver Fife
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Spin-off Appearances‎ ‎Mayberry R F D
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Bernard “Barney” P Milton Oliver Fife is a fictional character in the American television program The Andy Griffith Show, portrayed by comic actor Don Knotts
Favorite Quotes “NIP it in the Bud! NIP IT! NIP IT! NIP IT
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I noticed there was no favorite quote thread for this show, and that’s a darn Dwelled a sheriff and his buddy, pistol-packing Barney Fife
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Fife Quotes from BrainyQuote, an extensive collection of quotations by famous authors, celebrities, One of my great influences was Don Knotts as Barney Fife
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“Gomer get down there with them spiders!” – Barney “There ain’t no gold And don’t be hanging around when that truck comes through ” – Barney “Fly a quail
Favorite Barney Fife quote? – Democratic Underground
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I got mine “Now here at the Rock we have two rules Memorize them until you can say them in your sleep Rule number one obey all rules
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But, in Season Three’s The Bank Job, Barney gets locked in the vault and has However, in the much later episode, The Return of Barney Fife, we are told that
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Jefferson Davis Quotes. President of the Confederate States from 1861 to 1865.

Jefferson Davis Quotes – Jefferson Davis (born Jefferson Finis Davis; June 3, 1808 – December 6, 1889) was an American politician who served as the President of the Confederate States from 1861 to 1865. He was a member of the Democratic Party who represented Mississippi in the United States Senate and the United States House of Representatives prior to becoming president of the Confederacy. He was the 23rd United States Secretary of War, serving under U.S. President Franklin Pierce from 1853 to 1857.

Davis was born in Fairview, Kentucky, to a moderately prosperous farmer, and grew up on his older brother Joseph’s large cotton plantations in Mississippi and Louisiana. Joseph Davis also secured his appointment to the United States Military Academy. After graduating, Jefferson Davis served six years as a lieutenant in the United States Army. He fought in the Mexican–American War (1846–1848), as the colonel of a volunteer regiment. Before American Civil War, he operated a large cotton plantation in Mississippi but never owned more than 74 slaves. Although he argued against secession in 1858, he believed states had an unquestionable right to leave the Union.

Davis’s first wife, Sarah Knox Taylor, died of malaria after three months of marriage, and he also struggled with recurring bouts of the disease. He was unhealthy for much of his life. At the age of 36, Davis married again, to 18-year-old Varina Howell, a native of Natchez who had been educated in Philadelphia and had some family ties in the North. They had six children. Only two survived him, and only one married and had children.

Many historians attribute the Confederacy’s weaknesses to the poor leadership of President Davis. His preoccupation with detail, reluctance to delegate responsibility, lack of popular appeal, feuds with powerful state governors and generals, favoritism toward old friends, inability to get along with people who disagreed with him, neglect of civil matters in favor of military ones, and resistance to public opinion all worked against him. Historians agree he was a much less effective war leader than his Union counterpart Abraham Lincoln. After Davis was captured in 1865, he was accused of treason and imprisoned at Fort Monroe. He was never tried and was released after two years. While not disgraced, Davis had been displaced in ex-Confederate affection after the war by his leading general, Robert E. Lee. Davis wrote a memoir entitled The Rise and Fall of the Confederate Government, which he completed in 1881. By the late 1880s, he began to encourage reconciliation, telling Southerners to be loyal to the Union. Ex-Confederates came to appreciate his role in the war, seeing him as a Southern patriot, and he became a hero of the Lost Cause in the post-Reconstruction South.

Jefferson Davis Quotes

“All we ask is to be let alone.”
― Jefferson Davis

“The principle for which we contend is bound to reassert itself, though it may be at another time and in another form.”
― Jefferson Davis

“I worked night and day for twelve years to prevent the war, but I could not. The North was mad and blind, would not let us govern ourselves, and so the war came.”

“If the Confederacy falls, there should be written on its tombstone: Died of a theory.”
― Jefferson Davis, The Rise and Fall of the Confederate Government, Volume 1

“Garfield’s assassination attempt made “the whole nation care”.”
― Jefferson Davis

“Not mine, oh, Lord, but thine.”
― Jefferson Davis

“The contest is not over, the strife is not ended. It has only entered upon a new and enlarged arena.”

“The Slave must be made fit for his freedom by education and discipline, and thus made unfit for slavery. And as soon as he becomes unfit for slavery, the master will no longer desire to hold him as a slave.”

“Let men not ask what the law requires, but give whatever freedom demands.”

The people of the States now confederated…..believed that to remain longer in the Union would subject them to continuance of a disparaging discrimination, submission to which would be inconsistent with their welfare, and intolerable to a proud people. They therefore determined to sever its bounds and established a new Confederacy for themselves.
– Jefferson Davis

All we ask is to be let alone.
– Jefferson Davis

Truth crushed to the earth is truth still and like a seed will rise again.
– Jefferson Davis

Never be haughty to the humble never be humble to the haughty.
– Jefferson Davis

I worked night and day for twelve years to prevent the war, but I could not. The North was mad and blind, would not let us govern ourselves, and so the war came.
– Jefferson Davis

Never be haughty to the humble; never be humble to the haughty.
– Jefferson Davis

[Henry Ford] is too small to be treated as an obstacle round which the course of the democratic party should be bent.
— Jefferson Davis, Jefferson Davis, American

My early declared purpose and continued hope was to feed upon this enemy and teach them the blessings of peace by making them feel in its most tangible form the evils of war.
— Jefferson Davis, Jefferson Davis: The Essential Writings (Modern Library)

Tradition usually rests upon something which men did know; history is often the manufacture of the mere liar.
Scotland & The Scottish People

A government, to afford the needful protection and exercise proper care for the welfare of a people, must have homogeneity in its constituents. It is this necessity which has divided the human race into separate nations, and finally has defeated the grandest efforts which conquerors have made to give unlimited extent to their domain.

Sir, it is true that republics have often been cradled in war, but more often they have met with a grave in that cradle. Peace is the interest, the policy, the nature of a popular Government. War may bring benefits to a few, but privation and loss are the lot of the many. An appeal to arms should be the last resort, and only by national rights or national honor can it be justified.
Debate in the House of Representatives, (6 February 1846).

Unfortunately, the opinion has gone forth that no politician dares to be the advocate of peace when the question of war is mooted. That will be an evil hour — the sand of our republic will be nearly run — when it shall be in the power of any demagogue, or fanatic, to raise a war-clamor, and control the legislation of the country. The evils of war must fall upon the people, and with them the war-feeling should originate. We, their representatives, are but a mirror to reflect the light, and never should become a torch to fire the pile.
Speech in Congress, 1846.

Do they find in the history of St. Domingo, and in the present condition of Jamaica, under the recent experiments which have been made upon the institution of slavery in the liberation of the blacks, before God, in his wisdom, designed it should be done — do they there find anything to stimulate them to future exertion in the cause of abolition? Or should they not find there satisfactory evidence that their past course was founded in error?
Speech, 1850

Among our neighbors of Central and Southern America, we see the Caucasian mingled with the Indian and the African. They have the forms of free government, because they have copied them. To its benefits they have not attained, because that standard of civilization is above their race. Revolution succeeds Revolution, and the country mourns that some petty chief may triumph, and through a sixty days’ government ape the rulers of the earth.
Speech, 1858

What security have you for your own safety if every man of vile temper, of low instincts, of base purpose, can find in his own heart a higher law than that which is the rule of society, the Constitution, and the Bible? These higher-law preachers should be tarred and feathered, and whipped by those they have thus instigated. This, my friends, is what was called in good old revolutionary times, Lynch Law. It is sometimes the very best law, because it deals summary justice upon those who would otherwise escape from all other kinds of punishment.
Speech in New York, 1858.

Why, then, in the absence of all control over the subject of African slavery, are you agitated in relation to it? With Pharisaical pretension it is sometimes said it is a moral obligation to agitate, and I suppose they are going through a sort of vicarious repentance for other men’s sins… Who gave them a right to decide that it is a sin? By what standard do they measure it? Not the Constitution; the Constitution recognizes the property in many forms, and imposes obligations in connection with that recognition. Not the Bible; that justifies it. Not the good of society; for if they go where it exists, they find that society recognizes it as good…
Speech in Boston (11 October 1858).

Whether by the House or by the People, if an Abolitionist be chosen President of the United States, you will have presented to you the question of whether you will permit the government to pass into the hands of your avowed and implacable enemies… such a result would be a species of revolution by which the purposes of the Government would be destroyed and the observance of its mere forms entitled to no respect. In that event, in such manner as should be most expedient, I should deem it your duty to provide for your safely outside the Union of those who have shown the will, and would have acquired the power, to deprive you of your birthright and reduce you to worse than the Colonial dependence of your fathers.
Speech of Jefferson Davis before the Mississippi Legislature (16 November 1858)

We recognize the fact of the inferiority stamped upon that race of men by the Creator, and from the cradle to the grave, our Government, as a civil institution, marks that inferiority.
Reply in the Senate to William H. Seward (29 February 1860), Senate Chamber, U.S. Capitol. As quoted in The Papers of Jefferson Davis, Volume 6, pp. 277–84. Transcribed from the Congressional Globe, 36th Congress, 1st Session, pp. 916–18.
One of the fruitful sources, as I hold it, of the errors which prevail in our country, is the theory that this is a government of one people; that the government of the United States was formed by a mass; and therefore it is taken that all are responsible for the institutions and policies of each. The government of the United States is a compact between the sovereign members who formed it; and if there be one feature common to all the colonies planted upon the shores of America, it was the steady assertion of, and uncompromising desire for, community independence.
Senate speech (7 May 1860)

I will admit no bond that holds me to a party a day longer than I agree to its principles. When men meet together to confer, and ascertain whether or not they do agree, and find that they differ – radically, essentially, irreconcilably differ – what belongs to an honorable position except to part? They cannot consistently act together any longer.
Reply in the Senate to a speech of Senator Douglas, May 1860.

…How idle is this prating about natural rights as though still containing all that had been forfeited.
1860, Senate debate.

It would grant me much relief to learn your sons were engaged matrimonially to other white men if I was previously faced with the spectre of those same sons wedding negro women, slave or free, and siring negro sons that could presume to claim inheritance of your namesakes and property, or worse, equality with your purer grandchildren.
1860, Senate debate on legal status of interracial relationships.

There is a relation belonging to this species of property, unlike that of the apprentice or the hired man, which awakens whatever there is of kindness or of nobility of soul in the heart of him who owns it; this can only be alienated, obscured, or destroyed, by collecting this species of property into such masses that the owner is not personally acquainted with the individuals who compose it.
Senate speech, 1860.

[P]roperty in slaves, recognized as such by the local law of any of the States of the Union, shall stand on the same footing in all constitutional and federal relations as any other species of property so recognized; and, like other property, shall not be subject to be divested or impaired by the local law of any other State, either in escape thereto or of transit or sojourn of the owner therein; and in no case whatever shall such property be subject to be divested or impaired by any legislative act of the United States, or of any of the Territories thereof.
Compromise proposal (24 December 1860)

Are we, in this age of civilization and political progress… to roll back the whole current of human thought, and again return to the mere brute force which prevails between beasts of prey, as the only method of settling questions between men?
Speech (1861)

We feel that our cause is just and holy… [W]e seek no conquest… [A]ll we ask is to be left alone.
Message to Confederate Congress (29 April 1861)

We recognize the negro as God and God’s Book and God’s Laws, in nature, tell us to recognize him. Our inferior, fitted expressly for servitude.
Speech (March 1861), as quoted in Look Away!: A History of the Confederate States of America (2002), by William C. Davis, New York: The Free Press, p. 137

If the Confederacy falls, there should be written on its tombstone: Died of a theory.
The Rise and Fall of the Confederate Government, quoting a remark he had made in 1864.
We are not fighting for slavery. We are fighting for independence – and that, or extermination, we will have.
Reply to James R. Gilmore, 1864

Last speech before the U.S. Senate (21 January 1861), Washington, D.C.
I rise, Mr. President, for the purpose of announcing to the Senate that I have satisfactory evidence that the State of Mississippi, by a solemn ordinance of her people in convention assembled, has declared her separation from the United States. Under these circumstances, of course, my functions are terminated here. It has seemed to me proper, however, that I should appear in the Senate to announce that fact to my associates, and I will say but very little more. The occasion does not invite me to go into argument, and my physical condition would not permit me to do so if it were otherwise; and yet it seems to become me to say something on the part of the state I here represent, on an occasion so solemn as this.
It is known to senators who have served with me here that I have for many years advocated, as an essential attribute of state sovereignty, the right of a state to secede from the Union. Therefore, if I had not believed there was justifiable cause; if I had thought that Mississippi was acting without sufficient provocation, or without an existing necessity, I should still, under my theory of the government, because of my allegiance to the state of which I am a citizen, have been bound by her action. I, however, may be permitted to say that I do think that she has a justifiable cause, and I approve of her act. I conferred with her people before that act was taken, counseled them then that, if the state of things which they apprehended should exist when the convention met, they should take the action which they have now adopted.
I hope none who hear me will confound this expression of mine with advocacy of the right of a state to remain in the Union, and to disregard its constitutional obligations by the nullification of the law. Such is not my theory. Nullification and secession, so often confounded, are indeed antagonistic principles. Nullification is a remedy which it is sought to apply within the Union, and against the agent of states. It is only to be justified when the agent has violated his constitutional obligation, and a state, assuming to judge for itself, denies the right of the agent thus to act, and appeals to the other states of the Union for a decision; but when the states themselves, and when the people of the states, have so acted as to convince us that they will not regard our constitutional rights, then, and then for the first time, arises the doctrine of secession in its practical application.
I find in myself, perhaps, a type of the general feeling of my constituents toward yours. I am sure I feel no hostility to you, senators from the North. I am sure there is not one of you, whatever sharp discussion there may have been between us, to whom I cannot now say, in the presence of my God, I wish you well; and such, I am sure, is the feeling of the people whom I represent toward those whom you represent. I therefore feel that I but express their desire when I say I hope, and they hope, for peaceful relations with you, though we must part. They may be mutually beneficial to us in the future, as they have been in the past, if you so will it. The reverse may bring disaster on every portion of the country; and if you will have it thus, we will invoke the God of our fathers, who delivered them from the power of the lion, to protect us from the ravages of the bear; and thus, putting our trust in God, and in our own firm hearts and strong arms, we will vindicate the right as best we may.

The past is dead; let it bury its dead. Let me beseech you to lay aside all rancor, all bitter sectional feeling. Make your place in the ranks of those who will bring about a consummation devoutly to be wished – a reunited country.
In the 1880s, as quoted on an inscription at Vicksburg National Military Park.

Jefferson Davis quotes

Mosby, Rhett, Davis, Stephens, and other Confederates had no difficulty conceding what their descendants go to enormous lengths to deny, that the raison d’être of the Confederacy was the defense of slavery. It follows that, as the paramount symbol of the Confederate nation and as the flag of the armies that kept the nation alive, the St. Andrew’s cross is inherently associated with slavery. This conclusion is valid whether or not secession was constitutional. It is valid whether or not most southern soldiers consciously fought to preserve slavery. It is valid even though racism and segregation prevailed among nineteenth-century white northerners.

John M. Coski, The Confederate Battle Flag: America’s Most Embattled Emblem (2006).
The secession and the Confederacy’s existence were predicated on slavery, on preserving and defending it against containment, as virtually all of its founders from Robert Barnwell Rhett to Jefferson Davis unashamedly declared in 1861.

William Davis, Look Away!: A History of the Confederate States of America (2002), New York: The Free Press, p. 130
Jefferson Davis, on the other hand, had made clear from the first days of the war that his paramount goal was the attainment of independence… [H]e fought for such measures as conscription, central direction of the army, and the suspension of habeus corpus.

Paul D. Escott, After Secession: Jefferson Davis and the Failure of Confederate Nationalism (1992), p. 254
Jeff Davis did his best when he fled from Richmond to make out of himself a reconstructed woman. He made such a bad failure, however, that he deems the work simply impossible.

Republic: A Monthly Magazine (1873), p. 384
Julia Hayden, the colored school teacher, one of the latest victims of the White man’s League, was only seventeen years of age. She was the daughter of respectable parents in Maury County, Tennessee, and had been carefully educated at the Central College, Nashville, a favorite place for the instruction of youth of both sexes of her race. She is said to have possessed unusual personal attractions as well as intelligence. Under the reign of slavery as it is defined and upheld by Davis and Toombs, Julia Hayden would probably have been taken from her parents and sent in a slave coffle to New Orleans to be sold on its auction block. But emancipation had prepared for her a different and less dreadful fate. With that strong desire for mental cultivation which marked the colored race since their freedom, in all circumstances where there is an opportunity left them for its exhibition, the young girl had so improved herself as to become capable of teaching others. She went to Western Tennessee and took charge of a school. Three days after her arrival at Hartsville, at night, two white men, armed with their guns, appeared at the house where she was staying, and demanded the school teacher. She fled, alarmed, to the room of the mistress of the house. The White Leaguers pursued. They fired their guns I through the floor of the room and the young girl fell dead within. Her murderers escaped.

“Louisiana and the Rule of Terror”, The Elevator (10 October 1874), Volume 10, Number 26.
Control every single moment of a slaves life, every minute of their day; it would tell them where to go, what to wear, where to sleep, when to work, when to eat, what to eat, when to speak, when to be silent. This is probably the biggest form of government that human beings have ever invented in the whole of history. I vigorously support Abraham Lincoln’s federal takeover of the southern states, and his highly commendable commitment to human rights. Lincoln viewed secession as an attempt to expand slavery. The Confederacy was based on the glorification of inequality and tyranny. The southern leaders clearly spelled out their views. Their motivation was not to be left alone, it was to enshrine slavery. CSA President Jefferson Davis said all black people are ‘not fit to govern themselves’, and they should be treated in a manner similar to ‘lunatics, criminals and children’.
Joshua Felipe, as quoted in “The Libertarian Attack on Abraham Lincoln” (5 June 2010), by Gregory Hilton, The DC World Affairs Blog, WordPress
You say you are fighting for liberty. Yes you are fighting for liberty: liberty to keep four millions of your fellow-beings in ignorance and degradation;–liberty to separate parents and children, husband and wife, brother and sister;–liberty to steal the products of their labor, exacted with many a cruel lash and bitter tear;–liberty to seduce their wives and daughters, and to sell your own children into bondage;–liberty to kill these children with impunity, when the murder cannot be proven by one of pure white blood. This is the kind of liberty–the liberty to do wrong–which Satan, Chief of the fallen Angels, was contending for when he was cast into Hell.

David Hunter, letter to Jefferson Davis (1863)

They will hang Jeff Davis to a sour apple tree!
“John Brown’s Body” (1861)

It is no wonder that Democratic Senator Jefferson Davis became the first and only president of the Confederate States of America. Who but a Democrat could be so devoted to slavery?
Michael Todd Landis, “Dinesh D’Souza Claims in a New Film that the Democratic Party Was Pro-Slavery. Here’s the Sad Truth” (13 March 2016),

History News Network

Talk is abroad about removing statues of ‘Confederates’, meaning prominent Democrats, from the U.S. Capitol and some state capitols. The statue of Democrat Jefferson Davis, the ex-president of the Confederacy who also served as a Democratic Congressman, U.S. Senator, and Secretary of War in a Democratic administration, has been mentioned for possible removal from its place in Kentucky’s state capitol. Interesting. A growing mass call to remove the names of one prominent Democrat after another from the public square. One has to ask? Is it time to rename the Woodrow Wilson Bridge that crosses the Potomac from Virginia to Washington, the latter a majority black city? If so, may I suggest the name of Hiram Rhodes Revels, the first black U.S. Senator, in 1870? Oh, yes. Senator Revels was also a Republican.

Jeff Lord, “Will Democrats Apologize for Slavery and Segregation?” (25 June 2015), Knowing What We Know Now, The American Spectator.
The spirit of Jefferson Davis lives!

Trent Lott, speech before the Sons of Confederate Veterans (1984), as quoted in The Ku Klux Klan in Mississippi, by Michael Newton, p. 195.
The organization of federal units of black soldiers, comprised of both escaped slaves and free men, was taken as an outrage. It struck a raw nerve, never far off in the southern psyche. Fear of a slave insurrection. The prospect of African American men in blue uniforms was taken as an extreme provocation, so much so that it was proposed in the Confederate congress, and endorsed by General Beauregard, the hero of Fort Sumter, that all Federals captured, black or white, should be summarily executed. This proposal was never adopted, but the Confederate congress did eventually pass, in May 1863, a proclamation instructing President Jefferson Davis to exercise ‘full and ample retaliation’ against the north for arming black soldiers. Finally, there was simple revenge. The Union army’s shelling of Fredericksburg several months before had been a particular sore point, that festered for months as the Confederate army went into winter quarters nearby. One officer, determined to fix the destruction there in his mind’s eye, made a special visit to that town one last time before setting out on the road north into Maryland and Pennsylvania.

Andy Hall, “We have received provocation enough…” (1 July 2013), Dead Confederates: A Civil War Era Blog.
The final irony is that the vast majority of blacks have turned against the party of emancipation and individual responsibility and now support the party of slavery, segregation and Jim Crow laws that now imposes dependency and racist quotas. The same Democratic Party that tells them they cannot succeed on their own. The Party that tells them they are not good enough to intellectually compete with whites. And now we have a black candidate spewing the same vile line so that he can become the head overseer. This is the party that tells blacks they need the Democrats as a crutch: the same party that says it is not racist. Perhaps Jefferson Davis did get the last laugh after all. Did he not think that blacks were so inferior to whites that they could not be trusted to look to their own affairs? That without the slave-supporting Democratic Party the black man would be lost and helpless in a world he lacked the intelligence to barely comprehend.

Gerard Jackson, “The Party of Lincoln vs. the Democrats’ hate machine” (9 June 2008), BrookesNews.
The Alabama Democratic convention [instructed] its delegates to walk out of the national convention if the party refused to adopt a platform pledging a federal slave code for the territories. Other lower-South Democratic organizations followed suit. In February, Jefferson Davis presented the substance of southern demands to the Senate in resolutions affirming that neither Congress nor a territorial legislature could ‘impair the constitutional right of any citizen of the United States to take his slave property into the common territories.

James McPherson, Battle Cry of Freedom (1989), p. 214.
It looked queer to me to see boxes labeled ‘His Excellency, Jefferson Davis, President of the Confederate States of America’. The packages so labeled contained Bass ale or Cognac brandy, which cost ‘His Excellency’ less than we Yankees had to pay for it. Think of the President drinking imported liquors while his soldiers were living on pop-corn and water!

David D. Porter, Incidents and Anecdotes of the Civil War (1885), p. 274.
I think Stone Mountain is amusing, but then again I find most representations of Robert E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson outside of Virginia, and, in Jackson’s case, West Virginia, to be amusing. Aside from a short period in 1861-62, when Lee was placed in charge of the coastal defense of South Carolina and Georgia, neither general stepped foot in Georgia during the war. Lee cut off furloughs to Georgia’s soldiers later in the war because he was convinced that once home they’d never come back. He resisted the dispatch of James Longstreet’s two divisions westward to defend northern Georgia, and he had no answer when Sherman operated in the state. It would be better to see Joseph E. Johnston and John Bell Hood on the mountain, although it probably would have been difficult to get those two men to ride together. Maybe Braxton Bragg would have been a better pick, but no one calls him the hero of Chickamauga. Yet Bragg, Johnston, and Hood all attempted to defend Georgia, and they are ignored on Stone Mountain. So is Joe Wheeler, whose cavalry feasted off Georgians in 1864. So is John B. Gordon, wartime hero and postwar Klansman. Given Stone Mountain’s history, Klansman Gordon would have been a good choice. It’s also amusing to see Jefferson Davis represented. Yes, Davis came to Georgia, once to try to settle disputes within the high command of the Army of Tennessee, not a rousing success, and once to rally white Georgians to the cause once more after the fall of Atlanta. But any serious student of the war knows that Davis spent much of his presidency arguing with Georgia governor Joseph Brown about Georgia’s contribution to the Confederate war effort, and that the vice president of the Confederacy, Georgia’s own Alexander Hamilton Stephens, was not a big supporter of his superior. Yet we don’t see Brown or Stephens on Stone Mountain, either.
Brooks D. Simpson, “The Future of Stone Mountain” (22 July 2015), Crossroads, WordPress

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